Saturday, January 27, 2007

KSK Celebrity Super Bowl Pick Bukkake: Hutton Gibson

Mel gets his looks from my better half, Eva Braun.

The celebrity Super Bowl pick is a time-honored tradition, one we at KSK are super fucking excited to be a part of. For the next two weeks, stars from the world of entertainment, politics, and more will drop by to make their picks for the big game in Miami! Next up, religious zealot and father of Mel, Hutton Gibson!

The Super Bowl--the biggest threat to moral Catholics since the Jews confabulated the "Holocaust". Not surprisingly this scourge was perpetuated by heretics and heathens. Every year millions of Americans waste away worshiping false idols instead of spending the day in God's House praying for Judgement Day's arrival. I'll smile when they are all burning in eternal hellfire--especially that Peyton Manning. I think you know how I feel about the sodomites.

I don't care for Lovie Smith. I don't have anything in particular against the blacks but this one thinks he's a bit too clever. Well I have something to tell you Mr. Smith, I once won $150,000,000 on Jeopardy in 1908 and I wasn't born until 1918...Gloria in Excelsis Deo!

All I ever hear about the Tony Dungy is what a fine upstanding Christian he is. BLASPHEMER! That heathen doesn't understand the true meaning of the word, he should try doing it my way. Even I don't always understand my own mass, I took communion 333 times last week (I'm also an obsessive compulsive alcoholic). That amateur is no better than the Koran kissers in the Vatican.

What's with this Rex Grossman, they say he isn't a Jew but I can pick up his scent from here...it's like musk mixed with goat's blood and whitefish.

As for the game itself, I'll be praying for a flood that would drown Noah himself--Jew. If you really must make me choose I'll take the Colts 31-21...because I'm a craziest asshole alive. Now I have to go drink this liter of urine while cutting myself to The Passion.

Thanks, Hutton! We'll have more celebrity picks as we approach the big game!

11 comments:

Signal to Noise said...

Nice job, UM -- the only difference between Mel and his whack-job pop is that Mel would have worked in a "sugar tits" somewhere in those picks.

Sam T said...

whoa-rexy isn't jewish?

anon said...

God's watching me do number two? Oh, man. I'm a sinner, and God's a pervert.

Bender said...

Damn, I got about 2 sentences into that Wiki article on the Tridentine Mass before my head collapsed in on itself.

Are you happy, UM? Now I need to go get a new head. And I have you priced those lately?

Personally I blame the Jews.

Mike said...

Hutton's right. The Jews orchestrated the "upset" in Super Bowl III so all their fellow NYers could win more money betting on the Jets (switch the "t" with a "w" in "Jets" and what does it spell? Huh? HUH???).

Namath? A Jew. Look at his nose. Plus, only a Jew would ask a gal to kiss her. Real Aryan men just go ahead and do it.

And you know why else the Jews orhcestrated the "upset" is Super Bowl III? To keep God-fearin' Christians out of church on the Lord's day, and watching the National Football League (switch the "f" . . . and the "o-o-t-b-a-l" . . . and the second "l" in "football" with "J-e-w" and what does it spell? Huh? HUH???). And who sells all the advertising that they show during football games? (Rhymes with "Tagliabues").

Oh, and that Marv Levy jew? He's a Jew. And who'd he lose to in the first of his Super Bowl losses? The Giants. From Jew York! Be aware, Christian Brothers. Be aware.

doug_plank said...

eet Robbie Gould kicker of the Bears.

"Are you a Jew?!?!"

Thanks for coming you crazy drunken anti semite.

I have a feeling when Mel gets drunk that Australian accent comes out full blast making him sound like Jacko.

Remember drinking can be used for an excuse for
-racism(Mel)
-homosexuality(Republican congressmen)

Ross said...

You guys have to do a Bill Simmons celebrity pick. I would shit my pants from laughing so hard.

INS Webmaster said...

Mel Gibson isn't Australian. He was born in New York; Hutton moved the family to Australia when Mel was 12. Wikipedia to the rescue. Yes, I'm a nerd.

8hrdrive said...

Woah! mike must be a "university student" kill him!

Wasn't Mel Gibson in Conspiracy Theory?

thenewrealmccoy said...

I thought Hutton would have worked a Sid Luckman comment in.

goto11 said...

Is it just me, or does Hutton Gibson remind you of Peter's father on Family Guy? "You’re a good woman, Lois. Perhaps you won’t burn in Hell after all. Maybe you’ll just go to Purgatory with all the un-baptized babies."