The celebrity Super Bowl pick is a time-honored tradition, one we at KSK are super fucking excited to be a part of. For the next two weeks, stars from the world of entertainment, politics, and more will drop by to make their picks for the big game in Miami! Next up, conservative pundit, Ann Coulter!
It really pains me to say it, but I told you so, America. Decades of entitlements and set-asides for minorities in this country have resulted in this: the Super Bowl, one of, if not the, preeminent American cultural institution, will feature two black head coaches. That's right, African-Americans, who comprise only 12 percent of the overall population, now occupy 100 percent of Super Bowl head coaching positions. It's reverse racism at its most vile and we, the right-thinking America, must put a stop to it.
Now I'm sure you're in favor of this if you happen to be one of those wimpy, guilty conscience plagued liberals who read those Marxist mouthpieces, The New York Times or The Washington Post. Hell, you'd probably be even happier if it were Osama bin Laden and Hugo Chavez facing off for the Lombardi Trophy with illegal immigrants playing every position and gay marriages being performed at halftime.
And, honestly, who else is sick of hearing about Tony Dungy? Your son committed suicide last year. Boo-freaking-hoo. You know who else commits suicide? Terrorists. Tony Dungy is just like all those camera-mugging 9/11 widow harpies begging for attention and sympathy. Well, I'm sorry Tony, I'm too busy thinking about how this country is going to win the war on terror.
But don't let that make you think I'm rooting for Chicago, that liberal outpost of the Midwest. I'm sure Mayor Daley will have his shock troops ready to fix the game upon cocaine addict Barack Hussein Obama's command.
My prediction: Tom Tancredo carries all 53 states in 2008, including the three we annex from the Middle East and convert to Christianity, while Hillary gets bupkis. Then all the godless Massachusetts and San Francisco liberals sarcifice her to their pagan deity of science.
Oh, what? You want my prediction for the Super Bowl?
Fine. Colts 30, Bears 6. But Chicago only appears to score because the biased, liberal, equivocating, pseudo-journalistic rags, The New York Times and The Washington Post, change the score after the game.
Thanks, Ann! We'll have more celebrity picks as we approach the big game!