Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Even In Canton, the ROC Is In the Buildin'

Rock our own line, got our whole team laced
RW with the torch on my jeans by the waist
Without heat we still gon steam up the place
S-dot-Carter
Y'all must try harder
Competition is

Nada

Larry Johnson is one bad motherfucker. Although he's not the only guy in the NFL wearing Jay Z's S.Carter cleats by Rbk, he is the only one that doesn't suck balls. Well Grandmama II's feet are sending the ROC to the Hall of Fame in Canton, Ohio.

Thanks to the magical footwear of Jay Z, LJ was able to break the NFL record for carries in a single season (LaDanian = Pussy ?). Of course the league wants to mark the historic occasion which is why a pair of the famed cleats are headed for enshrinement in the only Hall of Fame that's still worth a damn.

These shoes are more worthy of a spot in the Hall of Fame than Mark McGwire, Jim Rice, and Goose Gossage combined.

Don't get me wrong, unlike some of my compatriots I actually love baseball, it's just that their Hall of Fame is gayer than this guy. Who really cares if Player X was 'roiding? All that means is that he wanted it more! So baseball, you've been called out. You guys need to get your shit together and be more like football, maybe you could dig up Sandy Koufax's old Rocawear yarmulke. Now that would show some khutspe!

12 comments:

isaac838383 said...

Rumor: Herm has just emptied his life savings into JayZ's football line of clothing.

Another rumor: Curtis Martin was wearing a prosthetic leg while filming the infamous McDonlad's commercials.

Unsilent Majority said...

McDonlad's = McDowell's fiercest competition

Suss & The Family Stone said...

Have you ever gotten their dobule bacon cheesebruger?

dusty said...

Perhaps they could obtain David Well's flip flops from the night he got ripped outta his mind and then pitched a no-no the next day.

Mike said...

Spelling chutzpah like the name of a Siberian wilderness guide or a Prussian dessert makes fun of someone's typo? Now that's chutzpah.

Must be good to be the king.

More importantly, the Doubel Whoppre at Bruger King is even more filling than the khutspe they serve with the schpetzle & the strudel at Oktoberfest.

Unsilent Majority said...

chutzpah is yiddish
khutzpah is hebrew
mike is a yenta

Mike said...

. . . and UM's a faigaleh.

But we're all a big happy family here, so it's cool.

Unsilent Majority said...

HAH! It's "faigeleh!

game. set. match. checkmate!

Mike said...

Drat, foiled again!

You well-poisoners always have to get in the last word. Just stay away from my Christian baby's blood, Shlomo.

fallex said...

Stay tuned, for next year LJ's ACL will be enshrined after it becomes detached from his body on carry #7.

The Pirate Sloth said...

You know, when I think of quality foot wear, that's going to not only give me better traction but also great ankle support...I immediately think of Jay Z. I mean who else in the world is more qualified to design shoes and knows what it takes to be a powerhouse in the NFL?

Run Up The Score! said...

I bet those cleats would relate better to black shoelaces.