Two Players With No Surnames, One Burgery Rumph

There were few bright spots for Pittsburgh fans Sunday during the comedy of errors that was the Steelers depantsing by the Bengals. One of the highlights, aside from that series where Carson Palmer fumbled twice and threw a pick on consecutive plays, was Ryan Clark, late of the Washington Indigenous Peoples, arresting the progress of the jailingest of the Jail Bengals, Chris Henry, with the force of three sobriety checkpoints. A shame he was knocked on his ass, because all the weed in his shoes would have cushioned the fall.

Henry was so shaken up, he was unable even to drunkenly drive himself home, relying instead on Brother Odell to be his shepherd through the valley of the sober. Once back in Cincinnati, he did sing praise (crossed himself and said HUGH!!) and spread the gospel of his liquid dinner all over the pavement when questioned by the cops.