Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Gary Busey Rumored to play Lee Carvallo

Nope, we've go absolutely nothin' we're not the least bit ashamed to admit it. That's why this morning instead of bringing you a creative and original material (not bloody likely) or some more prekkake we thought we'd mix it up a bit.

If you're anything like us you probably lay awake at night imagining your favorite video games as epic feature films (next summer, Tobey Maguire is Paperboy!). Well the Hollywood brain trust has woken up to the fact that our classic video games offer an untapped resource from which to steal their ideas. Forget about Super Mario, Lara Croft, that Milla Jovovich bitch. We want to see the real classics! I want Rose McGowan to play the titular role in Frogger: Hopping Mad and I want Shia Labeouf to actually contract dysentery while filming Oregon Trail.

Well now we've finally gotten that breakthrough we've all craved for so long. Enjoy the brilliance that is, Minesweeper: The Movie. Hey, it worked for Schindler's List (née Wolfenstein 3-D).



And if BDD asks, just tell him we talked about football and sodomy all week.

via College Humor

27 comments:

Jarrett Carter said...

What about Ving Rhames as Agua in the big screen version of "Bases Loaded?"

Or Jake Gyllenhaal as Little Mac in "Mike Tyson's Punch Out?"

flubby said...

I got mind control over Big Daddy Drew. He be like "shut the fuck up." I be quiet. But when he leave, I be talking again.

Ookie's Army said...

Continuing with Carter's Punch-Out idea.

Jesse Ventura: Soda Popinski
Ving Rhames (with a wig): Sandman
Charles Barkley: Bald Bull
Rosie O'Donnell (bald): King Hippo

brad said...

I think the time is right for Brendan Fraser to make his long-awaited and triumphant return to American cinema with Freecell: The Motion Picture.

I can see this being bigger than the Star Wars franchise.

Seriously.

NDub said...

Hi, I'm Gary Busey. I'm often angry and aggressive in times that don't call for it. (Stewie Griffin)

Does anyone else think Busey looks like a skeleton with saggy skin? Or like Nick Nolte's ebola-infested younger brother?

gerry dorsey said...

matt damon and ben affleck star in.....CONTRA!!!

up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, select, start motherfucker!!!

Burnsy said...

Chris Klein and Chris Evans star in "Excitebike".

Pemulis said...

will there be kkake of any sort today?


also, how about bob hoskins and john leguizamo as.... oh...

Biggus Rickus said...

Ben Affleck as Pete
Cuba Gooding Jr. as Hank
John Goodman as Ruth

in

Baseball Stars: American Dreams

Biggus Rickus said...

Carl Weathers is Elevator Action Jackson

grungedave said...

Dorsey, you are missing a "B" and an "A"

Biggus Rickus said...

Rob Schneider in this year's most delectable comedy.

Burger Time

albaNY Hawker said...

Hey, you're not fucking off on teh football posts...those dudes had eye-black!

Dr. Mexico said...

Dick Cheney and any innocent bystander starring in "Duck Hunt."

Biggus Rickus said...

Luke Wilson and Rene Zellweger in Ms. Pacman Act 1: The Chase

Edmond said...

here's one for another arcade classic

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWL6j0SvqV0

Dr. Mexico said...

Hugh Jackman in "Castlevania" I think would go over well as long as he can work a chain as well as he could use a crossbow.

Edmond said...

@Dr. Mexico
What a horrible night for a curse!

lieutenant winslow said...

Busey then asked Flubby if he could paint him

Wormfather said...

The stupid video isnt showing!

christoff said...

I recommend... feather touch
You have selected... power drive

Orlando Bloom in "Zelda: The Legend Returns"? I'm only thinking of the Lord of the Rings ears though.

meforpresident said...

Sir Anthony Hopkins and Dame Judy Dench in: Pong

mail said...

I was going to go with "Anna Kournikova is... PONG" but Dame Judy is a good choice too.

Josh Drimmer said...

truth is, I still feel stupider every time I've watched anything with the CollegeHumor seal of approval. I actually met one of the guys who founded that site, once. he was a dick.

Josh Drimmer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Josh Drimmer said...

but for the record, I'm going with scarlett johannson as judo expert blaze fielding, in 'streets of rage.'

genesis owners know what I'm talking about. it'd be a chance to watch that gal in action. lots of action:

http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/sexual-games/pics/sor3-2.gif

additionally, I feel very dirty now.

Don't Call Me Shirley said...

In a bizarre turn of events, I posted the same video on my blog today with a reference to "Shindler's List"..what the fuck are the odds of that? Probably about the same as those of the poor, poor Jews in that movie.