Guys, I think Julius Jones and T.J. Duckett are great players. I really do. And I like the way they fit into Seattle's offense -- T.J.'s a big back who has a disappointingly finesse style, while Julius has great field vision that needs outstanding run-blocking to have any kind of success. I plan to take them under my wing, you know, show them how to put those two styles together.
But I have to ask... is this really fair to Maurice Morris? He's obviously the odd man out in this equation. I talked to him earlier today, and he sounded excited about two men taking up his locker. I don't know why he'd be okay with switching teams at this point, but that's a sign that the team definitely signed two running backs to replace one. Right?
I mean, I even talked to Tiki. He assured me that these two free agent running backs are mere insurance for my inevitable Week 4 injury, and that the Seahawks will need my leadership on the sidelines until I come back in Week 8, stronger than ever. Then get injured again. Then play the final two weeks of the season. Maybe. The point is, if anyone knows that a team needs a veteran RB's leadership to succeed, it's Tiki!
Seahawks GM Tim Ruskell: Get out. You're fired.
Ruskell: No, I'm kidding! I just wanted to see how that would feel to say.
Ruskell: We gave you to the Raiders.
Alexander: You mean traded?
Ruskell: Are you kidding?! We couldn't get a prosciutto panini for your washed up ass. Although Al Davis sent us this nice Bo Jackson poster.
We're going to burn it in effigy the next time we play on Monday night and they run the clips of him destroying Bosworth and running into the tunnel.
Alexander: Oh. So... I guess I should--
Ruskell: Seriously, just get out. We'll mail you the contents of your locker.
(walks away dejected)
(falls down two yards before getting to door)