Thursday, November 29, 2007

Brokeback Namath


Seriously, man. I am the biggest g0ddamn gossip hound you ever saw. I just love Hollywood news. I follow it religiously because I have to be in tune with the "industry." If some starlet with lots of money and no real frame of reference on life breaks up with some fuckhead lead singer for some edgy band that I've never heard of, then I want the fucking SCOOP! And if there was an ice cream flavor named Maggie Gyllenhaal, you can bet your sweet ass that I'd...I don't really have an ending for that. But if I coulda worked in a callback with "scoop," it probably woulda been pretty awesome. Whoa.

No, so anyway, Variety.com is reporting that Maggie's brother, Joey Gyllenhaal has been tapped to play the lead in a motion picture about Joe Namath's life. You might remember Jack from that gay cowboy movie that was up for a bunch of awards a couple years ago, but it lost the Best Picture Oscar to that one movie where Matt Damon fingers that one chick during that traffic stop. But then, like she saw some dog in the road and flipped her SUV and so he had to rescue her from that burning car, so everything was cool after that.

But seriously, Fred Gyllenhaal is an amazing actor, and I'm sure this movie is going to be the bee's elbow. I mean, it's Joe Namath! I just hope that he gets that part locked up, and that he doesn't end up on one of those horrible Hollywood magazine shows with a DUI or something. Man, I'm glad this kinda stuff doesn't happen in sports.



15 comments:

fallex said...

I just hope that he gets that part locked up...
But beware the dreaded vapor lock.

Keith said...

They should cast Maggie as Suzy. You thought Namath's original come-on was a little awkward. Just wait till it involves siblings.

Phony Gwynn said...

I actually know the guy writing the script. Wrote with him at a short-lived sports-only paper in New York. He's a straight-fucking shooter, so I imagine it'll be a good flick.

Uh, tits. Penis. Taintfluff.

Phony Gwynn said...

@PG: Upon further review, it's probably not the same guy.

Dipshit.

SlideShow Bob said...

wow when did the Sports Gal start writing for KSK, you gossip queen you.

B.E. Earl said...

This is gonna be that Gyllenhall kid's best film since "City Slickers".

Mark my word.

bfreakin3 said...

i didn't know matt damon was in that movie where the girl from 'The Bus' is a racist.

darthmoridin said...

Gay sheepherders, not cowboys. Waaaaay more fem.

adam said...

Matt Dillon finger banged the black chick. Gett your piss poor actors named Matt straight fella.....

peter king crowned my ass said...

Matt Dillon finger banged the black chick.

I just want to say that all of the commenters on this blog are fucking geniuses.

Thank you.

Gourmet Spud said...

@adam:

The joke, that was.

Wonder if there will be a scene where a humiliated Namath is re-watching the Kolber thing on t.v., and says to himself, "I hope no one ever names a popular sports blog after this incident?"

Punch Rockgroin said...

I have this terrible feeling of deja vu.

NHZ said...

For a gay cowboy, Jake/Joey/Jerry/whatever his real first name is has quite the female following. Perhaps he's not entirely miscast as Broadway Joe. He did a good job in "Zodiac."

Maggie isn't Alba-level smokin', but she delivers the goods. I suppose it's probably totally non-revelant to point out that she's a good actress too. Can't say the same for the Biggest Tease Ever.

Jay said...

I've currently been awake for 19 hours, working on econometrics, corporate finance and other such incredibly boring shit, so the inclusion of the delectable miss gyllenhaal into proceedings is superb and some of these comments have made me laugh altogether too much. Excellent form, everyone.

the Associated Dress said...

M-m-maggie, donuts

Adam, see fastness.