Sunday, October 29, 2006

Adding insult to closed-head injury...

Ben Roethlisberger has revealed that after he suffered a concussion in Atlanta Sunday, he was taunted by the Falcons as he lay on the field. When pressed for names and details, Roethlisberger demurred. Nonetheless, the crack staff at KSK Labs has been feverishly reviewing audio of the game and come up with their best guesses at what exactly the Falcons said to Big Ben.







"You just got knocked da fuck out, man!"



"That's for ruining Christmas Ape's fantasy football team!"

"Wha' happened???"

"Fuck Chunky! Dinty Moore, bitch!"








"Dorothy Mantooth is a saint!!!"




"Yeah bitch, now you need ANOTHER appendix transplant!"

"I whole-heartedly deride your gridiron handiwork."

"This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass, Larry!"

"I'm Chauncey Davis and I approved this message!!!"

[What? You think you can do better? Give us your best guess in the comments.]



Update: Somone brought to our attention the increasing similarity between Big Ben and Donald "Ogre" Gibb (Revenge of the Nerds, Bloodsport, 1st & Ten). The two are headed toward an inevitable showdown on "Who's More Grizzled?"

8 comments:

Bump said...

Good luck spelling your last name now, beyotch!

doug_plank said...

"Tell Cowher we banged his daughters harder than dat!!!"

Signal to Noise said...

Take it like a champion!

mrmom61 said...

Good thing you were wearing a helmet bitch.

Anonymous said...

"Sorry, Benny Boy, but you STILL didn't cross the endzone plane."

Unsilent Majority said...

in honor of the above poster:

Cause the streets is a short stop
Either you slangin' crack-rock
or you got a wicked jump shot

8hrdrive said...

Sorry, we thought you were Charlie Batch.

Unknown said...

Don't you wish someone would answer that damn phone??