Thursday, December 21, 2006

Steve Irwin Memorial Meast Of The Week - Week 15


This is the time of year when film critic/child rapists like Gene Shalit release their top 10 lists for books, movies, shows, games, and all that stuff. I used to go watch independent movies and buy obscure music, until I realized that I liked the idea of liking that shit more than I actually liked it. For example, I saw The Squid and the Whale. I guess it was all right. But then I rented Firewall. Is it a good movie? Well, at the end, Harrison Ford buries a pickaxe in Paul Bettany's back. And that is fucking sweet. Well worth the $4 rental fee I paid, and far superior to watching a 10-year-old kid pull his pud in the school library.

So, with only my basest desires in mind, here was my favorite shit from 2006:

Favorite Movie: Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. This was released last year, but I don't particularly care. It has guns, blood, tits, and cheap gay jokes. Yup, that's a winner.

-So what do you do?
-I'm retired. I invented dice. What do you do?

I would have said The Departed, but the plot holes still annoy me. Let me just fire off 16 text messages during this back alley deal. I'm sure no one will notice.

Favorite Album: Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not, by Arctic Monkeys. Songs about getting drunk and being kicked out of clubs? Works for me.

Favorite Song: "Lightning Blue Eyes", by The Secret Machines.

Favorite TV Show: "Heroes", though why they cast Rivers Cuomo as Sylar is beyond me.

Favorite Book: Manhunt: The 12-Day Chase For Lincoln's Killer by James L. Swanson. I read about 2 books every year, and I don't like people who brag about reading all the time. Oh, you read a book a week? Here's a shiny dollar and go fuck yourself. Anyway, this book is tits. Who knew a history book would have so much stuff happening?

And there you go. Our Meast of the Week is Pacman Jones of the Titans.


Between spitting on women, buying his own car back at auction, and throwing birthday parties that would make Sidney Poitier cry, Jones has shockingly managed to become one of the best cover corners and return men in the league. His TD return against Jacksonville helped the Titans shove their noses into the AFC playoff race, a stunning development.

I bet Pacman's list of favorite shit from this year totally mirrors mine.

Have a great Christmas, everyone. Hope you have a good time with family, friends and whoever else you encounter.

28 comments:

Unsilent Majority said...

i read two books while simultaneously reading that post

Shenanigans said...

arctic monkeys are terrific, well chosen

Larry Bird Flu said...

UM -- since Drew doesn't care about black people, you should take your hip-hop love and get the best album of 2006, Night Ripper by Girl Talk. Just trust me on this one.

Get it on iTunes since he didn't clear any of the several hundred samples on the album.

Oh, and the Clipse album is hot too.

BoSox Siobhan said...

PacMan is the meast, indeed. But still no Pro Bowl love.

Captain Caveman said...

Um, hello? Can we get a spoiler alert? I'd been saving Firewall for Christmas Eve.

Unsilent Majority said...

i was saving sugar for my wedding night

Mike said...

I thought The Squid and the Whale was the alternate title of yesterday's fight bewteen Trump and Rosie O'Donnell.

The Last Unitard said...

He. Could. Gobble. Up. All. The. Dots.

Turns out I'm with leather. Someone shoot me please.

rsr26 (aka Johnny Utah) said...

It would have been cooler if Paul had put a pick axe in Harrison Ford's back. And someone tell Ford he can stop wearing that earring now. Douche.

Grimey said...

"Aw shit, here comes Pac-Man. Yo Pac-Man, what's up?"

Pac-Man: "Me, you bitches! I'm high on crack! Wanna freebase?"

Effern said...

How timely. I've been playing the [tar] out of "Nowhere Now" by The Secret Machines. Rawk.

BJ said...

What larry bird flu said. Yes and Yes.

CJ said...

Cold War Kids, 'Robbers and Cowards' front runner for album of the year, well, next year if you guys aren't killed by gonorrhea by then.

Rob I said...

Cold War Kids? Get off our Internet, hipster queer.

highonLowe said...

fuck, I was going to bitch about the no spoiler alert too, just got firewall from netflix on monday.
Oh well, whats next on the list? Over the Hedge?! dammit wife! I thought I changed the password so you couldn't log in anymore.

The Last Unitard said...

You people realize you listen to the same music Bill Simmons likes, right?

Top 3 albums this year:

The Slackers - Peculiar
Built to Spill - You in Reverse
Ghostface - Fishscale

Christmas Ape said...

unitard wins for nominating Ghostface. Mr. Lif is also high on my list for hip-hop albums of the year.

PhillyGirl said...

The Squid and the Whale was awesome - the kid whacking it, everywhere...priceless.

Also, to match, the dance scene at the end of Little Miss Sunshine, classic corruption of minors.

4giantsfans said...

I just came back from a liquid lunch. What the fuck's goin' on?

JoshLove said...

is everyone forgetting that Eagles of Death Metal released an album this year?

whitefolks said...

Count me in for Fishscale, too.

I've yet to take a listen to the entirety, but his recent verses have lead me back to Snoop Dogg. Also liked the last of J. Dilla's stuff that came out before he passed.

fallex said...

DangerDoom? Was that this year? A crossover of the best kind - intelligent hip-hop and stupid cartoons!! That album should come with it's own bong.

Unsilent Majority said...

everybody shut up about fishscale, it gets a nod in my post.

danger doom wasn't this year...st. elsewhere was.

Larry Bird Flu said...

Yeah, and the best concert of the year was the entire Wu Tang at Irving Plaza. Hands down.

Best non-hip hop record in my opinion was the Film School album. And EODM loses for getting kicked off the GNR tour after one set.

The Pirate Sloth said...

I'll only consider Jones Pro Bowl material when I start seeing him eat some Power Pellets and eating ghosts.

clarettsbailbonds said...

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Baseball Bookshelf said...

Lightning Blue Eyes? When on the same album there's an "Alone, Jealous and Stoned"? For shame.

Barry.Petchesky said...

Arctic Monkeys? Could you be anymore of a NME poseur?