When it's all said and done we may look back on this past Sunday as the most pivotal day in the grueling epic commonly known as fantasy football.
On a side note, I think it's about time we change the name of this game that we all love so much. When I hear "fantasy football" I think about Scarlett Johannson trying to tackle the Greased Up Deaf Guy...but I'm kind of weird like that.
Regardless a number of measty stat lines could be found in this week's box score, but who was most deserving? Lee Evans had a monstrous day that ruined my fantasy football team's week, but he did it against the triple A Texan defense. Frank Gore rushed for over 200 yards but his end zone allergy really started flaring up. Sadly it manifests itself in the form of a condition known as "sloppy wet vagina hands", the very same ailment that nearly ended Tiki Barber's career before he was popular enough to get a television job.
This week I'm handing out the KSK Meast of the Week to Ocho Cinco, CJ 85, Mr. Chad Johnson. I am an unabashed fan of the greatest thing to happen to to Cinci since Tony Cottrell became DJ Hi Tek (not too much happens in that city). Chad finished the ritualistic rumphing with a meast dampening 190 yards and three touchdowns. Those 190 yards just happened to account for 69% of the Bengals' aerial output, and yes, the entire purpose of this sentence was to see 69 in print.
With all that being said I'd be remiss if I didn't point out the single meastiest play of the week. In fact, I'm going to be bold and declare this the official Measting of the Week. This is Robert Griffith, he will not be trifled with.
I haven't seen a Lion get massacred like that since Mufasa...what? too soon?
If you have a new name for fantasy football please feel free to post it in the comment section...unless your suggestion is "huge waste of time for fucktards"...thanks a lot grandma.