I wrote a quick recap of the Rams-Seahawks game over at the FanHouse, and I joked in the headline that Scott Linehan was outcoached by a piece of driftwood.
Linehan, in case you missed it, conducted a successful replay challenge on a pass initially ruled incomplete, which erased the Rams' 4th-and-6... and gave them a long 4th-and-one. (Not necessarily a great challenge, but he got it, so good for him, right?) So, leading 16-14 in the fourth quarter, Linehan shuns the 30-yard field goal (Jeff Wilkins: 11-for-11 on kicks inside 40 yards this year) and went for the first down.
Incomplete pass. Final score: Seahawks 24, Rams 22.
Anyway, driftwood: just one of the many things that could have outcoached Linehan yesterday. I huddled with the rest of the KSK gang, and we compiled a list of entities and inanimate objects that could outcoach Linehan.
* George Allen Jr.
* a Tofutti Cutie
* corpse of Ed Bradley
* corpse of Art Shell
* automatic garage door opener
* a merkin
* that homeless guy you avoided eye contact with an hour ago
* salad fork
* The opposing coach from Hoosiers
* Tom Landry's hat
* Courtney Love
* Ignatius J. Reilly
* Jell-O sculpture of Denny Green (lime Jell-O)
* Terry Schiavo
* Chasey Lane's worn out vibrator
* Gilbert Gottfried
* The retarded Baldwin Brother
* Chris Simms's spleen
* you, if only you believe
* the remnants of Georgia Frontiere's soul
* cracked refrigerator magnet
* Eric Dickerson
* week-old seafood salad
* Mike Martz
The good news for Linehan is that we did manage to rule out dirt. He could definitely outcoach dirt. But not that store-bought dirt. That stuff's packed with nutrients.