Thursday, August 3, 2006

Hall of Fame Game is 3 Days Away

Face it, the start of the NFL preseason is like picking your girlfriend up at the airport and only getting a handjob that night, either because she's "tired" or "just wants to talk" or some other bullshit. Naturally, we don't mind, because we understand that the more spirited encounters are right around the corner. And because we've had ellipsiod-shaped blueballs for all this time, we'll take whatever we can get.

But it's not only preseason for the players and the teams, but also for you. We're serving notice: get ready. Stock your fridge with cheap beer. Post the phone numbers for your local pizzerias in a safe, dry place. Get your pregame music situation sorted out. Or, just head over to this guy's place.



I do believe he is ready for some football. Somebody throw that guy a Big Mac.

15 comments:

We Must Protect This Hoff! said...

I'm not sure what excites me more about the notion of heading over to his place, the chance to listen to the Aaron Neville CD on that sweet stereo or playing rock, papyrus, spear head to see who gets the last slice of that pizza.

Beban said...

Nice picture. I had no idea Whitney Houston was a Ravens fan.

Anonymous said...

Danny Boy, ain't that yo mama????

bigtdog said...

Rock, papyrus, spearhead. Awesome

Unsilent Majority said...

that's the most attractive baltimore fan any of us could find

Anonymous said...

Ugh, gross. Who drink Coors Light?

A.R.P. said...

I'm suhprised he won be headin overta Bateman's, hun. I'll pick up uh six uh Natty Boh and come over. We'll git treyshed. Go Ravins! No better team in alluh Ballmir. Hey, call up Cowl. Yeah, Cowl Ripkin, he lives uppin Owins Mills ya know, right outsiduh Ricester's Towen.

albaNY Hawker said...

That dude's downright hefty compared to kelly jennings!

Fennis Dembo said...

Fresh off their World Cup victory over the USA, the Chairman of the Ghana Football Association sits in his office and plots Operation Afroturf, the tiny nation's next step toward toppling American world dominance.

doug_plank said...

I thought the same thing, the poor bastard has to suck back Silver Bullets.

The horror...the horror.

A.R.P. said...

When's Kyle Boller cumin overr? Did he get holed up in Dundawk?

I hate the ravens.

Anonymous said...

Oh, so funny, MoCoRons busting on the fine people of Baltimore for being for not being as pretty as they are. It never gets old.

Well, we may not have all of our teeth and our fashion sense can best be described as "bargain rack" but we do have advantage over our neighbors to the south, former Ravens cheerleader and all time hon, Stacy Keibler.

Johnny Cakes but not gay said...

Damn MMP, that's a fucking amazing analogy! I would say the HOF game is like getting said handjob from your girlfriend and then realizing halfway through that handjobs are for 7th graders and telling her you are not going to be jobbed until it's for real.

Scott said...

Man, prison really did a number on Jamal Lewis.

Mike said...

Don't throw that man only one Big Mac! Throw him at least ten!