Friday, March 16, 2007

Your Friday Afternoon Cheers And Jeers


CHEERS to the concept of St. Patrick’s Day, which involves drinking lots and lots and talking in a stupid Irish accent. You know how much this infuriates the Irish? Delightful.

JEERS to St. Patrick’s Day in execution. The bars are disgustingly crowded, you can't hear anything your friends are saying, lots of drunken annoying women singing abound, and everyone’s passed out by 2AM in a tepid puddle of vomit that is not their own.

CHEERS to the NCAA Tournament, which provides us with an orgy of games and brings us all together to in hopes of seeing copious amounts of both riveting drama and barely legal cheerleader jailbait.

JEERS to this particular NCAA Tournament, which so far blows donkey balls.

CHEERS to Homer Simpson for his recent charity work.

JEERS to this rusty tailgate.

CHEERS to the Ladies blog for betting against us in the NCAA tournament (they lead us by one point)

JEERS to the entire KSK Gay Mafia for reading Andrea’s original email without failing to notice the actual prize involved in the wager and heading straight to the “loser has to provide pictures” part. Good job, men. We embody every male stereotype ever perpetuated, even the queer ones.

CHEERS to Dan Shanoff and MJD for their liveblogging work on Deadspin

JEERS to the asshole who started off his liveblog “Two of my college buddies (JackO and House) flew to L.A. to watch the games with me and double as my peanut gallery.” Nothing beats flying in your friends to come laugh at all your jokes.

CHEERS to Sportsline.com’s scoreboard, which is awesome.

JEERS to ESPN and SI’s scoreboards, which are decidedly not. The new SI.com layout is so annoying, I may abandon reading Peter King to make fun of him altogether.

CHEERS to the Chargers for going back to white helmets

JEERS to the Chargers for not going back to the powder blue jerseys. What the fuck is wrong with you people?

CHEERS to me. God dammit, I am one fineass piece of manmeat. And cheers to Mrs. Drew for choosing such a strapping young buck for a groom.

JEERS to you, for not being me.

CHEERS to Ufford for his brilliant piece on John Amaechi at With Leather.

JEERS to Ufford’s translucent skin. Hey Ufford, I can see your heart beating.

CHEERS to little football pants on attractive women.


JEERS to, well, nothing to jeer about that. Enjoy the weekend, children.

43 comments:

liquid_d said...

Cheers to bars opening at 8 am tomorrow

Jeers to my being passed out by 4pm.

rdg said...

Cheers to my coworker letting my non-NCAA basketball watching bum in on his bracket.

Jeers to him taking my $20 and *not* laughing at my pick of "Brady Quinn over Winthrop".

Ass.

BeaverFever said...

cheers to irish whiskey

jeers to irish cuisine. potatoes, cabbage , and irish soda bread. no wonder they drink so much.

o.k., back to cbs.sportsline ncaa game tracker. it does kick ass.

rar288 said...

Cheers to Duke for providing me with much hilarity yesterday.

Jeers to Duke for thinking they can win any games with only white players. What the fuck were you thinking?

devang said...

cheers to Guinness. Is there a better beer?

jeers to the fucking ice storm outside. Now I can't go out to the Tequila Bar tonight.

Signal to Noise said...

Liquid_d: 8 AM? Amateurs.

CHEERS to at least two local pubs here being open at 6 AM tomorrow.

JEERS to my bank account balance being in the negative by 2 AM on Sunday.

Signal to Noise said...

devang: no. no there is not.

Also: Cheers to Irish Car Bombs.

Jeers to green beer. Even though it's green, it's still Bud Light with food coloring.

cinnamon girl said...

on a personal note, cheers to me that St. Patty's Day is the anniversary of my dee-vorce, allowing me to marry current hubby.

jeers to me for still being at work, while current hubby is at home watching basketball and drinking.

liquid_d said...

signal,
the bar opens at 8, my fridge opens at 6.
and green beer really does suck.

The Weepy Beej said...

Cheers to drinking all day.

Jeers to the 90% chance I wake up next to a fat chick.

devang said...

I may try this drink called the 5th element:

Bacardi 151
SoCo
Everclear
sprite
pineapple juice

Anyone have a spare liver?

lieutenant winslow said...

God dammit, I am one fineass piece of manmeat.


if i had i nickel for every time those words came out of my mouth

Danny G said...

Cheers to drunken premarital sex with a random slob tomorrow then never talking to her again

Jeers to the raging hangover that will keep me in bed or running to the bathroom all day Sunday

impresario919 said...

if i had i nickel for every time those words came out of my mouth

You'd have half as much as if you got a nickel for every time something came in to your mouth?

Redhead said...

Cheers to any holiday that centers around drinking.

Jeers to Wisconsin - what the hell is happening right now? Are they going to lose the Corpus Cristi?

My Insignificant Life said...

Cheers to the clock ticking midnight and St. Pat's Day officially beginning - why wait to 8am or 6am?

Cheers to college memories of green beer, over served college chicks and sneaking out of their rooms before the sun rises

Jeers to – well, there is nothing to jeer about when it comes to St. Pat’s Day!!

Otto Man said...

No, no -- Cheers to Wisconsin. Their suckitude is about to help my bracket immensely, just like Notre Dame.

Otto Man said...

Cheers to the clock ticking midnight and St. Pat's Day officially beginning - why wait to 8am or 6am?

True Irish patriots start the drinking when the clock strikes midnight in Ireland.

Smello said...

Cheers to NYC for allowing me to show up at a bar at 1:30am and still be able to drink for MANY hours.

Jeers to the d-bag in the kilt who will think it's OK to try to grab my boobs because it's St. Patrick's Day & he's drunk.

devang said...

Jeers to the d-bag in the kilt who will think it's OK to try to grab my boobs because it's St. Patrick's Day & he's drunk.

Whatever you do, DO NOT waste your drink by throwing it on him. Puke on him if you must.

devang said...

I'll be in class all day tomorrow, so I won't be able to start until after 6 PM.

All, please have a drink for me.

(Weeps silently in a corner)

cinnamon girl said...

devang - will do. just in case, I'll actually have 2 - every hour.

Signal to Noise said...

Cheers to the college girls in my town who dye or shave certain areas creatively for the day and feel the need to show it off.

Jeers to the douchebags who have to ruin the spontaneity of exhibitionists for everyone by demanding to see more.

Jeers to the d-bag in the kilt who will think it's OK to try to grab my boobs because it's St. Patrick's Day & he's drunk.

Bonus, though: a jackass wearing a kilt probably isn't wearing any sort of protective gear for the cock-blast.

Wanda (aka Metschick) said...

jeers to the fucking ice storm outside.

Cheers to being poolside in Miami.

Jeers to being in Miami with a 2-year old.

DrDoom said...

cheers to the 2 year old for being in maimi with metschick

devang said...

Metschick,

How about this? In Jersey, in an ice storm, trying to do some work with 2 & 3.5 year old boys.

Enjoy poolside in Miami.

I like this game.

@Cinnamon Girl
Thanks

Mike said...

Cheers to the college girls in my town who dye or shave certain areas creatively for the day and feel the need to show it off.

Jeers to the college girls in my town who dye or shave certain areas creatively for the day and feel the need to show it off when I don't live in that town.

My Insignificant Life said...

Cheers to those of us starting St. Pat's Day on St. Pat's Day Eve....

the butler said...

Cheers to the word "cheers" - I really should use it more often.

Jeers to devang having CLASS ON SATURDAY, much less St. Paddy's Saturday.

Do you go to school in China?

devang said...

Jeers to devang having CLASS ON SATURDAY, much less St. Paddy's Saturday.

Do you go to school in China?


No, just in Jersey. Like that's any better. Working on my EMBA.

Can't go out on my b'day due to the shitty weather, OR on St. Paddy's due to class. Have I depressed you people enough or should I call Clint?

Laser Rocket Arm said...

Cheers for St. Patrick's Day also being my saint's day, and for NYC bars that would offer free booze to women like me named Patricia so I could get wasted by 8:30 in the morning, and for hot firemen and cops in kilts that were easily picked up in said bars after the parade, and for sneaking out of my chosen victim's place the next day with my panties in my purse.

Jeers that if I tried to do this now, if the liquor didn't kill me my husband would.

janie said...

Cheers - for living close enough to Dublin to fly there for £20.

Jeers - for not renewing passport in time for St.Paddy's, and instead being stuck in with four kids and a brother who's pissing away my just-in-case-there's-a-nuclear-war sized supply of alcohol as I write.

devang said...

@janie. Cheers for the giant supply of alcohol. You will need it if you watch the ManU Bolton slopfest.

janie said...

devang - yeah, I'm more concerned about the Liverpool-Villa clash on Sunday though. I'll need at least one bottle of Jamesons for the arse-whipping the Reds'll give us - I swear to God, I'm kicking my brother out if he doesn't pack it in. Leeching bastard.

Joep Smeets said...

Cheers to this magical day you call St. Patrick's Day

Jeers to its absence on the Dutch calender.

devang said...

Janie, yeah that'll be a tough one for you. Always good to have a bottle of painkillers. Good luck though

janie said...

Cheers mate

devang said...

Cheers Janie

Nacho Friendly said...

Not for nothing, but here's a wonderful clip of Bukkake brand milk

Crazy Little Thing said...

Hey, Simmons didn't fly his friends in to laugh at his jokes, he flew them in so they'd made jokes he could put in his column. Makes less work for him.

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God Hates Raiders Fans said...

Cheers to the creative writings of the guys here at KSK for making this deployment to Iraq go by quicker.

Jeers to not being able to consume any kind of alchol for roughly 365 whole days.

mamacita said...

Cheers to joep smeets!
Cheers to Dutch pride!
Cheers to wearing orange on St. Patrick's Day!

and Cheers to buying god hates raiders fans his first drink when he comes home