Yesterday Andy Reid met with Donovan McNabb to clear up any potential rifts between the franchise and it's star quarterback. Fortunately for you KSK was there; so find out what it's like when these two stop actin' polite, and start actin' real. Mad real.
Andy: Hey D-Mac, thanks for coming in for this chat. A lot of people seem to think there's some tension here and I just want you to know that we remain committed to you.
Donovan: Fuck you fat man.
Andy: Yeah, I was a bit concerned when you didn't answer my text message. Any particular reason why you didn't get back to me?
Donovan: Threw my phone, heard a snap.
Andy: Why would you break your phone?
Donovan: Phone's good, arm's fucked.
Andy: Good Lord son, why would you do such a thing.
Donovan: Watchin' the draft, ya'll fucked me good. And remember I ain't your son. I piss clean like a mountain stream.
Andy: Donovan, let's not get upset here.
Donovan: Ain't upset, pissed off!
Andy: So this Kevin Kolb situation is going to be a problem?
Donovan: We got lots a problems motherfucker.
Andy: Please watch the language Donovan, I'm a man of God.
Donovan: God tell you to fuck me in the ass on Saturday?
Andy: Of course not Donovan, it's just that you tend to crack like a damn egg. That homosexual latin fella saved me last year and he's gone now. We had an opportunity to bring in a great prospect to back you up so we took it. We're just acting in the best interest of the franchise.
Donovan: Forget that second round cocksucker for a minute. I saw how ya'll traded out of the first round.
Andy: Well we just didn't see anybody on the board at the time that we really needed. By moving down we were able to take Kolb.
Donovan: And you just had to let the Cowboys step in the spot.
Andy: Trading within the division is really no big deal.
Donovan: You wouldn't be spoutin' that bullshit if you were gonna spend the next five years runnin' from that crazy asshole they drafted. He's gonna break my damn neck because you couldn't just draft a fuckin' receiver?
Andy: We've got a great offensive line and plenty of targets for you to throw to.
Donovan: I needed a fuckin' wide receiver you dumb piece of shit! You think I'm gonna throw to Reggie Brown all year? Fuck that shit, I'm holdin' out. I got Chunky Soup money backin' me up.
Andy: Don't do anything drastic. Keep in mind we did pick up an undrafted wide receiver.
Donovan: What the fuck good is he gonna do? Only way he's gettin' a job is if he can braid my ass hair.
Andy: Great things sometimes come from unexpected places. Remember, Joseph Smith found the Golden Plates buried in the hill Cumorah.
Donovan: That's it fat man, when you start talkin' that crazy shit I know it's my time to leave. Get me a goddamn receiver or I'm gonna have my boy send your kids some black tar care packages.
Andy: That's a low blow Donovan.
Donovan: You have one day.