Will Leitch: A Day In the Life

I read the news today oh, boy
About a lucky man who made the grade

Will Leitch, our Patron Saint of the Blogosphere, is taking a deserved day off following the Cardinals' World Series victory. A lot of people (losers and/or stalkers) have been wondering how a guy could possibly tear himself away from his passion, and they've wondered how he'll fill the time. Once again KSK is here with all the answers to questions that you're too shy to ask. Let's all take a peek into a day off in the life of a loser.

To Do List

• Read KSK, attempt to comprehend the brilliance

• Find out how much Scott Spiezio made this season, convince Denton to double it

• Sodomize that guy from Can't Stop the Bleeding

• Go see Little Children, wonder how it was greenlit before Life As a Loser

• Call Tom Perrotta, ask him to reimburse 2 hours of life and $10

• Find out who does Colin Meloy's hair

• Check in on Deadspin's progress, demand more money from Gawker
  

• Pose in front of some bricks in case somebody out there is taking pictures

• Steal Bill Simmons' address book, tear out the page marked "Kimmel, Jimmy"

• Pay somebody to kick Kimmel's ass
  

• Update shrine to Andy Rooney

• Dance like nobody is watching you, destroy the video evidence this time

• Decide between Smells Like Teen Spirit and On a Plane for next book title

• Sunbathing in Central Park with ARod

• Prepare Mayoral campaign for Mattoon, Illinois

Hell, who needs Deadspin when you've got all of that to take care of in a single day. What else do you think Mr. Leitch might be doing today? Let us know in the comments.