Monday, January 8, 2007

Only This Time We Stand No Chance Whatsoever

Of course this post would fall to me. *Sigh*...

Hello KSK readers. Welcome to the BEST SPORTS BLOG on the Internet, as determined by the totally, completely, and in every which way unbiased opinion of the Weblog Awards. Being a New York City blogger, I learned recently from some hoity-toity (non-award-winning) New York City bloggers that the Weblog Awards are the Golden Globes to the Bloggies' Oscars.

Why do I mention this now? Well, the Bloggies are accepting nominations now through January 10th. And this year, for the first year ever, there's a sports blog category. Now, believe it or not, I'm not going to beg or promise hot buttered man-love, partly because my powers of whoredom are drying up, but mostly because this is the nomination process, and we can't stump for votes the way we did last month. In fact, here's how it goes down for the blogosphere's most prestigious awards:

From now until 10:00 PM Eastern Standard Time (GMT-5) on Wednesday, January 10, 2005, anyone can nominate their favorite weblogs.

That Saturday, January 13, three panels of 50 voters will receive an e-mail. It will list the weblogs that have receieved the most nominations in ten categories. They will have until 10:00 PM EST on Thursday, January 18 to privately submit their five favorites (six for Weblog of the Year) for each category. The five (or six for Weblog of the Year) receiving the most votes will become finalists. I (Nikolai Nolan) will only vote for the panel in the case of a tie for fifth place. This panel is on an opt-in policy; there is a checkbox on this form for it.

On Monday, January 22, the finalists will be announced and voting will be open again to choose the winners.
Confusing as shit, right? Anyway, it would be nice to be nominated, considering we are the BEST SPORTS BLOG and all, but we've gotten a late start to this thing, and you can only nominate us -- er, your favorite blogs -- once. However, there's no limit to the different categories we can be nominated in. Here are some of the fields we can be classified under:

- Best American Weblog. Hey, we write about fuckin' FOOTBALL, man. Who can compete with that?
- Best Sports Weblog. (Ahem.)
- Best Weblog About Music. Hey, remember the race flame wars after Big Daddy Drew wrote up his rock n' roll playlist? I do, and that's why I'm not linking to it.
- Best Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual/Transgendered Weblog. It's no accident we're the KSK Gay Mafia. Also, we like lesbians. Well, in theory, anyway.
- Most Humorous Weblog. Pajiba actually endorsed us for this. Pretty cool.
- Best Writing of a Weblog. With Unsilent Majority's syntax, we definitely don't deserve this one. You should vote for Wizznutzz.
- Best New Weblog. We done got born in late June back in ought-six, and we've been crushing brown stars ever since.
- Best Group Weblog. The requirement? "Weblogs written by an exclusive group." It doesn't get more exclusive than the Gay Mafia. We're having our own Super Bowl/BEST SPORTS BLOG award party, and you're probably not invited.

Don't worry, I've been saving sticks of butter, and I'll bring my camera.

Anyway, if you get the hankering to head over to the Bloggies to fill out the nomination form, be sure to have other blogs in mind -- you need to single out three blogs in any field you nominate KSK decide to cast a vote. For example, for Best Sports Blog, I nominated Kissing Suzy Kolber, With Leather, and the Seahawks FanHouse The Dugout.

A lot of people will vote for the usual excellent blogs (see our blog roll), but don't forget the valiant, noble writings of the Diecast Dude, either. That guy loves us.

Okay, thanks for your attention during the self-promotional shit. For your patience, here's some cheerleader tit-tays.

(Italicized and parenthetical NOTE: You may remember my promise to write the ultimate Sports Figure/Team as Pop Culture/Historical Icon post if we won the Weblog Award. I haven't forgotten about it -- it's on the docket for after the Super Bowl, when all of our storylines dry up. I make good on my promises.)


becky said...

if you made good on your promises, we would have seen some fucking butter by now.

dried up powers of whoredome = a bona fide tragedy.

swing4 said...

For a man who makes reference to a contemporary tragi-noir novel/film to convey a sense of vulnerability, compulsion, and resignation in the face of futility, on a football blog, I would do pretty much anything. Consider yourself nominated.

Unsilent Majority said...

my syntax brings all the boys to the yard.

Rob I said...

You should have listened to me a week ago. I nominated freedarko, Deadspin, and the wine review column at KSK.

Unknown said...

I put KSK up for nomination yesterday. Best post had me stumped however as there are too many Hall of Famer's to choose from.

Chris(BessMervinGirlDetective) said...

i used the pk man love post, does that make me a bad person?

Becky said...

Sexy Rexy is the HOF post for me. Done, and done.

Sack said...

Don't sell yourself short just yet. Did you check out last year's bloggies winners? Lame. I followed a few links and quickly fell asleep at my desk. The one that you named greatest literay experience of all time had much better depth. Besides, if Rextascy doesn't push you over the top, there is no point in winning anyway. There is no end zone in the flats has become my new life mantra.

Anonymous said...

uh, my word verification thing was 'smenita' too. weird.
Did you get a coffee this morning and the starbucks guy said 'thanks a latta'? yeah, I wanted to punch his teeth in too.

Anonymous said...

it should also be noted that I didn't order a latta. You just don't say shit like that to a man ever, much less before 8am.

Head Chick In Charge said...

I nominated you for most humorous blog days ago. Ya'll don't write about sports, do you?

Suss said...

Am I legally bound to follow these rules, or can I nominate my own blog on my own time?