Friday, January 5, 2007

Cowher Retires to Harvest Spittle, Daughters With a Jump Shot

WWL is reporting Bill Cowher is done after 15 seasons as head coach of the Steelers, which comes as a shock to no one, really. If only other people made it this easy.

The Steelers are holding a press conference at 1 p.m. to announce they and the Penguins are leaving town Cowher's retirement.

Having drenched this site with enough homerific content this season, I won't go into some long-winded elegy for the frothing, frowning one. He's been the Steelers coach since I was 10 years old. Almost all my personal associations with the team are with him as coach. He won a title, went to the playoffs each of his first six seasons and only had three losing years. Also had sex with one gay black quarterback. Quite a run. Coupled with Dick Hoak's retirement, that's a lot of Steelers history gone in the last week.

I hope he enjoys watching his daugters play basketball for two years, quickly grow sick of his family, then take up the reins of the Panthers in 2009.

Russ Grimm Era begins in 3, 2, 1...

8 comments:

Suss said...

Chin up, Ape.

(Had to.)

Unknown said...

Like graduating from college after only 8 or 9 years, I think it was time for this to happen.

The only consolation is that this is such a plumb job that we should have our pick of the litter when it comes to the new guy, whoever he is.

But whoever it is, he better keep Dick LeBeau on the headset as D-coordinator

Ernest Riles said...

one can only resist the power of the animal chin for so long.
http://sportsunfiltered.blogspot.com/2007/01/chin-growing-too-fast-muststopcoaching.html

Unknown said...

I predict Bill will be watching "some" of the basketball games while they all play in MIAMI.

Chris(BessMervinGirlDetective) said...

Does this mean the terrible towels will be flying at half mast this week?

Anonymous said...

Cowher wearing orange and teal is about as likely as Johnny Cash getting a spray-tan.

Angelos said...

Sadness. I love that guy, and I'm no gay black quarterback.

It is amazing to me that in my 27 years of Steeler fandom, I've only known 2 coaches.

Big shoes to fill. Here's to the next 15 years.

peytonloveskenny said...

Since Cowher's been the Steelers' coach since I was four, I obviously don't have any memories of the Steelers without him. It's definitely going to be weird watching the Steelers without him.