Thursday, April 3, 2008

Construda Regional Final: No. 1 Viking vs. No. 6 Chief. WHO YA GOT?

The Chief has already withstood one battle against a band of seafaring marauders in addition to the anguish of killing one of his own. Now, it's back to the seafaring marauders, just this time they don't have guns. Apparently you voters have taken an about-face on the top seeds and Chief is the biggest underdog going into the round. Who advances to meet the TIGAH!?

NOTE: The poll is at the top of the sidebar to the right. Voting for each contest is open until the end of the day that it's posted. Voting for this contest is closed. The Viking won with 61 percent of the vote.

Viking
Pro:
-In pairs, have amusing viral videos.
-Makes a nice refrigerator
-Again, probably named Leif
-Ragnarök an effective spell in Final Fantasy III

Con:
-Is Ralph Wiggum in Dreamland
-Just signed Gus Frerrote (Again!)
-Thor movie will probably suck
-Beloved by Drew
-Inspired the Nazis (probably all that blond hair)
-Rare breed of extinct white people



Chief
Pro:
-Leader
-Cigar store Indian very imposing
-slang for smoking weed
-Would like to clear up the myths about this scalping business
-Headdress distractingly flamboyant



Con:
-Leader of side that lost
-Defined by job title
-Can be used as patronizing term of affection
-Old
-Rain Dance of little use in this case
-Possibly named Chief-Loses-To-Viking

19 comments:

Otto Man said...

The Viking is represented here by a French cartoon character named Asterix. Let me repeat: (1) French origin, (2) kiddie cartoon, (3) the symbol used to denote suspicion.

The Chief, meanwhile, is represented by malt liquor and a Professor Longhair video that manages to give you a contact high even when seen over the internet.

I rest my case.

whowillsexmutombo? said...

Otto -
Don't forget, if Asterix is there, Obelix can't be far behind. Deal with THAT, chiefs.

Cayceecal said...

I don't think there are enough nerds/asian teenagers to understand that Ragnarok joke, the exception being me of course.

futuremrsrickankiel said...

Under the Chief's weaknesses, you forgot:

- is deceptively difficult to spell

futuremrsrickankiel said...

Or maybe that's a strength?

Brendan said...

History shows that the Vikings could not conquer the Native Americans. Now the Tuscaloosa Alcoholism Genes or the Ft. Wayne Small Pox Blankets might stand a chance.

Steve said...

I know this is a mascot Kill Kill Kill tourney, but I just don't feel good about having teams quarterbacked by Brodie Croyle and Tarvaris Jackson and coached by Herm Edwards and that child molester guy in the final four of anything.

Animal Mother said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Animal Mother said...

Vikings should be the call here.

Chiefs lost to the white man.

Vikings are white men.

Ergo, Vikings > Chiefs.

But then again, the Chiefs have won a Super Bowl and the Vikings are still 0-4.

Claude Balls said...

But then again, the Chiefs have won a Super Bowl and the Vikings are still 0-4.

Now, that's just cruel.

Otto Man said...

Now, that's just cruel.

But true. Great White Father Hank Stram approves!

rukrusher said...

"Let's matriculate the ball down the field."

Chief +1

the great bambi said...

and the chiefs' win was over the vikings

SlideShow Bob said...

The tomahawk is just a smaller not as deadly form of a Axe.

Gotta go with the Vikes

Unknown said...

Wasn't Ragnorak the esper and the sword, and Ultima the spell? Pretty sure it was. That's better, anyway.

Unless Chief can cast Life 3... then Viking's fucked.

Chief should win. I don't want the Viking name winning some online vote and pushing back the day when they officially become the Purples Jebuses.

Anonymous said...

Chief is about the only patronising term of affection known in New Zealand.

As soon as you hit customs in NZ you will start to hear it.

That pissed me off. Go the Vike!

m. Alana said...

You've got a lot of gaul, calling Asterix a viking.

/I'll show myself out

J said...

@futuremrs

they also forgot

"inability to handle the firewater"

this is no problem for the Viking

/Viking in a landslide

Clock Cleaner said...

Sage Rosenfels is now part of KSK?