Friday, June 30, 2006

Site Update: We Will Post More Often

When the Suzy Kolber Kissers decided to go forth with this site, we expected a rather slow build to the 2006 season. We figured that with five of us, we could each post once a week, giving a handful of readers a little bit of chuckle.

Oh, who are we kidding? We knew we were gonna be huge; we just didn't think it would happen this fast. In our first three days, thanks to mad props from Deadspin and Mr. Irrelevant, we've registered over 800,000,000 unique visitors. And you know that that's true, because I used a number to prove a fact.

Anyway, with a long holiday weekend looming, your new favorite football bloggers are going to be busting their asses working on comedy previews for all 31 pro teams, plus the Texans (Except Drew -- he's changing diapers on vacation like the domesticated little bitch he is. And yes, I will use that Texans joke ALL YEAR). These previews, along with other funny tidbits about fantasy football and various retards around the NFL, will be published haphazardly and continuously until the beginning of the season. We're going to try for two posts a day Monday through Thursday, one post on Friday, and zero arrests from masturbating to porn while driving on the weekends.

So, enjoy the Independence Day weekend -- America, FUCK YEAH! I leave you with this...


God, could he BE any more dreamy?

24 comments:

Beban said...

Please ask Tom Brady to stop eye fucking me. Thank you.

The Dude said...

Yes, Salman Rushdie is a sweet piece of ass.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Unsilent Majority said...

dude, you should see my buddy Sal Bass

Holly said...

Somewhere on the internets there's a video of me screaming at a televised interview following another New England shellacking of Indy that includes the sentence, "YOU HUSH YOUR WET SEXY PETULANT-LIPPED MOUTH, TOM BRADY!!"

There's a fine line between hate and hot.

Swing4 said...

Anybody remember those auto insurance commercials with clips of the moronic things people do while driving (putting on mascara, reading the paper, etc.), with the tag line "they're out there"? What I wouldn't give to see round two of those ads featuring the video of Eddie Griffin. Best ad idea evah!

chiswede said...

No CC, he could not be.

Juancho said...

Only when he's wearing his sailor's uniform.

Still, dude has the rings, the cash, Bridget Moynahan...

The Dude said...

UM, they're the same guy ... salman -- bass ... He just switched one fish for another!

mrmom61 said...

So bring on the drunken gay football players. No time to rest. Make with the funny.

diz2000 said...

god this guy has it all good looking great quarter back can you image all the chicks this guy get dammmmmmmmmmm !!!!!

Tom said...

You know what would be a good way to post more often: More Site Updates!

Beban said...

diz2000, kill yourself. You're a goddamn moron. Tom, calm the fuck down, give the boys some time. They'll come with the funny soon enough, but they have other priorities, like having families, living life, and thinking shit up. Go play a sport and chill out.

fanucman said...

Okay looking at that cover, tell me how the hell Brady didn't make the gay list! He definitely looks like he wants a piece of me in th pic!

Captain Caveman said...

Danny Boy -- thanks. Drew noted something during our private roundtable discussion at the secret KSK headquarters hidden in the Andes: blogging about your blog is as bad as it gets. Actually, the word he used was "gay."

Anyway, Tom, fear not: all site updates from here on out will come at the end of a REAL football post.

Tom said...

Damn, Danny Boy. I was joking. I do probably need to curtail my use of exclamation points, though...maybe more ellipses...that's the ticket.

Beban said...

CC- Christ, the Andes? I hope this isn't about you guys.

http://tinyurl.com/hht73

If you have to make the choice, eat Footsteps Falco.

Sargent Schlatter said...

i wish that was tom brady on that motorcycle instead of roethlisberger.......

Anonymous said...

The reason for so many site visits. The title of the blog. Increase traffice from lesbians who thought it was a porn/fantasy site for them.

Tony said...

Wait. This ISN'T a lesbian porn site? Damn internet browsers.

Oh, and if that's Rushdie, they're real.

Dweeze said...

So Holly, you're going to make that comment and not post a link? For shame, Holly. For shame.

Unsilent Majority said...

the only lesbian porn you'll see on this website will be coming from the carolina cheerleader tryouts.

Holly said...

Dweeze, for the sake of what's left of my dignity, I'll leave it to your imagination.

But trust me, it ain't pretty.

Son of Brasky said...

diz2000- in the words of the great Charlie Murphy:
"That's the gayest shit I ever heard!"

So far, so good, KSK.