The most devoted KSK stalkers are well aware that my birthday -- like the start of the NFL season -- is less than 4 months away, and for those of you who feel that maybe I don't spend enough time thinking about football or booze, may I encourage you to send me the special edition Seattle Seahawks bottle of Maker's Mark. And now, for the sic-alicious eBay description:
This bottle is from the maker’s mark NFL collectable series that was out in limited numbers per each team a few years back. Most of these bottles or in Seahawks fan collections & will not resurface in the collector market. Therefore, this is your chance to get one of these great looking Seahawk bottles. The dip is perfect & the runs look great.
In my limited experience, the runs never look great.
Other selling points here are the old-school Seahawk colors of royal blue and gray, rather than the monochromatic blue and neon green that's all the rage with precisely no one.
Also, take note that the bidding for a rare Seahawks edition of Maker's Mark is only $35. That's a pretty good deal, considering that you can fetch several hundred dollars if you use a Sharpie to change a tallboy of Steel Reserve into "Steeler Reserve." Ah, Pittsburgh: the Ohio State of the NFL.
I hear Jerramy Stevens has a big stash of these! Give him a call.
ReplyDeleteIn my experience everyone who drinks Maker's Mark is a
ReplyDeletedoucheba....ohhhhh, it all makes sense.
Tell the truth CC, you actually own almost all of the bottles in existence, don't you?
ReplyDeleteAnd you know you're jealous of the neon green gloves Qwest passed out to us last season.
Wormfather, where do you live? Maker's is the best widely available affordable bourbon.
ReplyDeleteHate to say it, but you're out and out wrong. Paging Siobhan and people who know likker to back me up.
What does any of this have to do with pooping on towels?
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMy brother in Everett sent me a link to this and, while I love Maker's Mark (the family of my sorority big sister in college owned a large share of it), why not just melt your own candles and make your own before you peel off the wax and get blasted?
ReplyDeleteNectar of the gods.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite cocktail: Maker's + ice
While I do prefer the single malt over nay other brown likker, I must say that Maker's on the rocks is pretty damn good.
ReplyDeleteThat's actually a good point burnsy - isn't the one thing that makes those bottle special the one thing keeping you from the actual liquor? You're going to have to destroy it to drink it anyway, might as well just make one yourself.
ReplyDeleteAnd while I'll admit to not knowing as much about bourbon as other liquors, I like Knob Creek.
What does any of this have to do with pooping on towels?
ReplyDeleteBoth are brown and one is good for you
fuck ice, just give me that warm brown liquor.
ReplyDeleteAs a Makers Mark Ambassador, it is my duty to back up CC here. Wormfather, if you know of a better bourbon that I will just barely be able to afford like I can with Makers, let us hear it.
ReplyDeleteMine too, Flubby. It's even nicer on ice than Reuniti.
I need to go on a Bourbon Tour
ReplyDeleteI wonder if they did one for the Lions, and if so, how it is distinguishable from the Seahawks bottle. Maybe Honolulu blue wax is easier to find than I'm imagining.
ReplyDeleteActually BDD, my limited edition Dolphins bottle was made with scented candles. That scent? Poo.
ReplyDeleteWhere is my limited edition New York Giants bottle of Sambuca?
ReplyDeleteWhoa, whoa, whoa Mr. Caveman, no one's saying the crap is expensive, heck I'm a Johnnie Walker Black (green if they have it) on the rocks type of guy. All I'm saying is that when my dad used to drink it he was a douche, one of my frat brothers lived on the stuff, douche, one of my friends drinks it and thinks it makes him pretentious, douche.
ReplyDeleteIn fact, for now on everytime someone orders a Maker's Mark, I'm ordering a salad with a side of olive oil, seeing as how I'll already have the vinegar.
/shutter
I'm here, albeit a little late to staunchly defend MM as the best affordable bourbon on the market. Hey - I dipped my own bottle when I was in Kentucky last year. It looks like shit, but I still haven't opened it. Kind of like how your mom used to put your really ugly art up in the fridge. I'm really proud of it.
ReplyDeleteWolfmother may have a point...
ReplyDeleteI would venture that this is theory this is a ploy for the attention of female boozehounds that seem to regularly troll KSK in an almost cougaresque fasion.
Using in booze and football to get female attention would fall in the douchey/non-awesome category. Plus, its way out of line with misogyny being hilarious and all. I'm pretty sure that if KSK had a mission statement there would be something about being awesome.
For shame Man of Cave...
(Also, I'm waiting for the slam dunk joke about being too white to pick the obvious Hennessy & Hpnotiq giftset)
A theory that this is... Dyslexic am I.
ReplyDeleteCougar?
ReplyDeleteGuilty as charged.
I don't know much about Maker's Mark, but I have had some Woodford Reserve and I must say that bourbon is the tits even though I am more of a cognac and dark rum aficionado.
ReplyDeleteWhat I don't get is why would you put wax on the cap just so you need to rip it off to get at the likker?
What the fuck is wrong with you people?
ReplyDeleteBourbon is fucking delicious, Maker's is good bourbon, and just because someone knows three allegedly douche-y people -- I say allegedly because this somebody was in a fraternity -- who drink it, it's a douche drink? Good thing this is on Blogger, because you people would be banned.
In conclusion, single malt scotch >>> Johnnie Walker.
The Lions are coming out with a commemorative bottle of Ripple- the screw top will be Honolulu blue and silver. The bottle is still full of chunks, though.
ReplyDeleteAnd if you can't get Blanton's, or Booker Noe, Maker's Mark is a perfectly cromulent bourbon.
Seriously. What right-thinking person doesn't like bourbon?
ReplyDeleteAre you people really arguing about kinds of alcohol? All alcohol is delicious and worthy of rapid consumption.
ReplyDeleteWhat if there's is a brown stain on the label? (I drink a lot of 'shine.)
ReplyDeleteQuote "In my experience" that's my experence, take what you will, a grain of salt if you like.
ReplyDeleteBut all and all...methinks thou dost protest too loudly.
One more thing, say what you will about me, but you's best not be talking shit about my boy Johnnie, maybe you didnt notice, but he's black.
Honestly, I've been at tailgates when we've had to run around and scrounge people's leftover Tequiza. Booze is certainly booze.
ReplyDeleteWormfather: this is the last I'll speak of it. The bottom line is that out of nowhere, you insulted something beautiful and loved by many good people. Which is fine; we do that all the time. Where you misstepped is that you were ENTIRELY FUCKING WRONG.
ReplyDeleteAnyone who drinks any brown liquor straight or on the rocks automatically has redeeming qualities, and to call them a douche -- Mr Frat Boy -- is using a grave insult far too loosely.
@CC Aggreed.
ReplyDeleteNow I need to unwind with a nice cosmo or maybe an apple martini.
Funny, every Johnny Walker drinker I've ever met is a royal assclown.
ReplyDeleteIf you're going to drink scotch, why don't you take off your skirt, put away the blended crap, and get a nice single malt. I'd recommend Cardhu in particular, or Balvenie.
Maker's is the standard for good, widely-available bourbon, though I tend to prefer Knob Creek if they have it. If you've got a little more cash, step up to Woodford Reserve or Basil Hayden's, then Baker's, and then the nectar of the gods known as Booker's.
My name is Otto Man and apparently I'm an alcoholic.
@otto Because I like johnnie's mellow body and sweet smooth finish, bitch.
ReplyDelete...that' didnt come out right, lol.
BDD - You are, of course, right. Many kinds of boozey treats are delicious and it's important to keep an open mind.
ReplyDeleteI used to think I hated gin. Then I met Hendrick's which has since become a dear, lifelong friend.
I'm just happy that Maker's Mark is making good use of the Dairy Queen dip-cone technology.
ReplyDeleteI was a scotch snob for the longest time, until about a year ago. I was at a concert, and the bartender asked me if I like bourbon. Not being born yesterday, I answered the affirmative.
ReplyDeleteHe handed me a Maker's on the rocks that some schlub had ordered before his credit card got declined. Maker's is indeed tasty, but even moreso when it's free.
Hey CC, didn't we do this already?
ReplyDeleteIs Maker's really much cheaper than Knob for everyone else? I can get a fifth of Maker's for $20 and a fifth or Knob for $22. Granted both beat the crap out of the cheap stuff like Beam or Early Times. Also Siobhan, when it comes to gin have you tried Plymouth? It's the nectar of the gods.
ReplyDeleteHey, hey - no making fun of the Johnnie Walker drinkers! For a nice, everyday scotch it can't be beat. I'm not going to be recommending it as a great scotch to anyone who knows about the subject, but in a bar, Black Label on the rocks is the way to go.
ReplyDeleteI'm open to trying something new, mdz. Do you think Plymouth will be readily available in DC? I don't live in a fancy neighborhood; the liquor stores tend to stock lots of single 40's and Thunderbird.
ReplyDelete@redhead,
ReplyDeleteJW Black on the rocks is fine for everyday consumption since single malts can get expensive.
@bosox siobhan
does that stop you from drinking?
How has this not become a draft?
ReplyDeleteI would have said mock draft, but the word "mock" has no place at all in this conversation.
I'd expect you can find it in DC (the first time I had it was in Arlington) because it's stocked in the middle of nowhere Indiana. I wouldn't call it that fancy, ~$25/bottle, it's just some good gin.
ReplyDelete...in other news leopards just dropped about 50 places on my kill list
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ceQr90C0Em0
...unless you want to put a "The Hand that Rocks the Cradle" spin on the video.
@BDD - Are you people really arguing about kinds of alcohol? All alcohol is delicious and worthy of rapid consumption.
ReplyDeleteSpoken like a married man with a child.
/married
//with two kids
by the way...
ReplyDeleteTalisker is the way to go for all people who consider themselves as persons having both an X and a Y chromosome.
How dare you argue with Captain Caveman? HE IS A COMBAT VETERAN!
ReplyDeleteI don't wanna live in a world where you have to get up before 9:30 to make Jerramy Stevens jokes.
ReplyDeleteJohnny Black is an excellent bar drink when served on the rocks, or with a single rock.
ReplyDeleteIf you have to go single malt, I side with The Glenlevit. Especially since their City Links tour in Atlanta offered ALL THE SCOTCH YOU COULD DRINK.
Maker's is good, but for its chik appeal, I am lovin' the Early Times.
Gin- also consider Boodles. It's like 16-20 bucks a bottle, depending. Full of lovely junipery goodness!
ReplyDeleteFinally, Someone Thought to Combine Alcoholism with NFL Fandom
ReplyDeleteThis guy?
http://deadspin.com/sports/nfl/come-on-ask-him-about-chad-pennington-233560.php
(Note the glass in his hand.)
I can't believe people are even speaking ill of Maker's Mark.
ReplyDeleteSave your booze ire for Thunderbird or Mad Dog, if you have to speak badly of anything alcoholic.
Oh, and the Booze Draft needs to be had this week.
The Booze Draft is a capital idea!
ReplyDeleteDrew is 100% right. All alcohol is worthy of consumption. For Christ sake, it was no less than a year ago I was getting twisted off Colt 45, and getting weird looks from the professionals who shared my train home on the daily commute. Do you think I really care that Wild Irish Rose has been called "A Republican plot to kill the homeless"? Madness. If it doesn't blind you or make you sterile, drink down, young man.
ReplyDeleteAnother Maker's Mark Ambassador here to tell you that it is a wondrous elixir. in fact i once drank a fifth of it and cured myself of an ear infection. Now if big worm had name checked Johnnie Blue then I might be impressed.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, Van Winkel Special Reserve is the best bourbon ever made.
What's the word?
ReplyDeleteThunderbird
What's the price?
A dollar twice
What's the reaction?
Satisfaction
Hey, at least Makers Mark is better than Wild Turkey.
ReplyDelete*note: Wild Turkey and I are no longer on good terms. The Turkey seems to think that when we associate together - that I need to find things to pee on, hump, punch, poop on, throw, puke on, or fist. These extra-curricular activities are hard to explain the next morning to any of the following, in order: girlfriend, mother, police, grandmother. And the phrase "It seemed like a good idea at the time" isn't a sufficient explanation to any of those.
@yesiamahooker, Johnnie Blue and I have a sordid history.
ReplyDeleteA while back my fiance proposed an idea, she'd buy me a big bottle of Johnnie Blue but when it was gone I had to stop drinking for a month (she thinks (I know) that I'm an alcoholic).
Well I took the bait thinking that I'd make that bottle last for months if not years...well a week later I was on my first and last sobrity stint of my life and ever since I've hated the taste of Mr. Blue.
@ The Pirate Sloth
ReplyDeleteThat reminds me of a Dave Attell routine where he talks about the wonders of Jack Daniels and it's ability to make you black out or as he liked to call it "time travel".
So true, so true.
Yea, thats why me and Jack Daniels don't hang out anymore either. Time Traveling and the events that it causes are hard to explain to the same people I mentioned above.
ReplyDeleteFor all you Maker's Mark fans who also happen to be Barbaro fans, e-bay has something special for you.
ReplyDeletehttp://cgi.ebay.com/MAKERS-MARK-BARBARO-KENTUCKY-DERBY-VIP-BOTTLE-MAKERS_W0QQitemZ230126895979QQihZ013QQcategoryZ13916QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem#ebayphotohosting
Kissing Suzy Kolber Comment Board : The Palestine of Hard Liquor
ReplyDeleteWhat's the word?
ReplyDeleteThunderbird
What's the price?
A dollar twice
What's the reaction?
Satisfaction
@yesiamahooker
That is some funny shit right there.
Wow, I now know what I going to be drinking, either when I go to toast a Seahawks championship, or if I win the lottery. Or when it's Saturday.
ReplyDelete@Jackin'4Beats:
ReplyDeleteAsk him where he learned that bit of modern poetry.
Maker's hot toddy > chicken soup, ecchinea, vitamin c, whatever. cold relief plus tasty drunken goodness.
ReplyDelete@yesiamahooker
ReplyDeleteOk, spill the beans, where did you learn that mighty fine bit of modern poetry?
His dad, who is also my dad.
ReplyDelete@siobhan
ReplyDeleteYour Dad is coooooooool.
So is my Dad. He brings this back for me when he comes back from vacation.
My dad always tells me that any man who doesn't scoff at my regular Maker's Mark on the rocks is a keeper.
ReplyDeleteIf I have to choose something other than Maker's, I usually go with Bushmills or Redbreast- all thanks to that rust belt tolerance to alcohol.
CC, if you like Maker's, you'll love Black Maple Hill. Very few bars carry it, but you can find it in alot of stores. Stay away from anything younger than 14 years (I myself go with 16 and older), and you'll thank me.
ReplyDelete