Mistake by the Lake vs. Insidious Cosmic Joke by the Same Lake. WHO YA GOT?

It's a battle for Lake Erie supremacy, dredging duties and wasted playoff berths as two surprising teams string their respective long-suffering fanbases along just a little longer. Who gets led down the garden path a little further to impending disappointment? Who bemoans fate louder? But more importantly, WHO YA GOT?

Contestants

Cleveland Browns__________Buffalo Bills

Effect on local waterways

Becomes flammable___________Becomes sausage gravy

SI designated city nickname

Believeland_______Mark Ruffalo (PK picked that one)

Intimidates opponents with

Raffish disregard of defense________Frightening 289 photoshop

Reasons for inclusion of M.I.A. on 2007 best-of list

Looking open-minded_______Marv Levy likes that exotic ass

Favorite new word

w00t_________wuh-erd?

What they'll bring to the postseason

History of futility______History of humorous futility

Finishing move

They're all witnesses_________They're feral in their whiteness

Cleveland Finally Wins Something

Tails never fails, motherfucker.

So Cleveland "won" the coin toss today. Actually, the Bucs lost it. The Bucs GM called heads. What the fuck is heads? And why did HE get to call the fucking coin? Shouldn't there be some arbitrary method to figure out who gets to call the coin?

Anyway, we're done for another week. We may have a surprise for you coming up after the weekend, but we won't jinx it. Your cheerleader today is Christy, seen here playing quarterback. I hear she's also a great tight end.


See you next week.