The topic of this off-season's first mock draft is as deep as it is star-laden. The key terms here aren't Upside Potential or Length, instead we focus on attributes like Fuckability and...uh, Fuckability. So now without further ado, we present the KSK Mock Draft: Who Would You Do, the movie character edition!
The rules are simple, draft a character from a movie, once the movie has been picked it is off limits and once an actress has been picked all of her other roles are off limits. Additionally, the character or actress must have been over the age of 18 at the time the movie was released :(
No porn allowed, and remember, you're sleeping with the character (think one night only) and not the actress.
We drafted in the traditional serpentine fashion with the draft order as follows... Maj, Ufford, Flubby, Punter, Drew, and Ape (Drew would have gone last but he cried like a little girl separated from her mommy.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifVfMHf2GNKyGXRFX_o0CT6yUJ-C9DmH7AKa4S14fMY1WoGRvzKKDjJARTGDrwFDGyQzQsun2XxA_CFTArkKiLjORmP9VI4WpFHAPTym7-EbxBOY4DUSoorTDawvQlB4NYDMC5xg/s320/Nancy_callahan.jpg)
I'll get things started with a character played by the most beautiful woman alive. She's an innocent dancer with a heart of gold in a cruel and unforgiving world, and I'd like nothing more than to bang the shit out of her.
2. (Flub) Lacey Underall - Caddyshack
That's a quality pick right there, I was foolish to hope she'd last longer.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNwrvHZLgwwuOZ0fkb7m_htKNgBrzaHZMH5NDRtVQDRIVGSIdMuqai-WSMccelv8ghP2qIFddKvRuk3ZYz67_eQxyRtCLIusE7teYuZPSPBZRyVECGr7k9_l5wXHWZOhOkpPehng/s320/RollerGirl.jpg)
Ufford: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck it kills me not to take Scarlett.
The draft's first shocker!
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl9YlqULbElFfstiAJbIQOsUfLqnmj9Rw4TOKCyfFIsukCm-bd_5RCBSoWZP4_R9E7p_wT-Nnx7VuGTBjRZf1aaZ6Fa6uEt2t-nCAQPZCoHY9nU3Misgi4UK-ui889xGqFaBmMiQ/s320/2phoebe.jpg)
Ufford calls the pick "savvy" and I all it "classic." Then I start to think of Jimmy Kimmel and I get a little sick. Regardless, Judge Reinhold had the right idea and I like to think that he got a little piece of Phoebe Cates in between scenes.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkL5727-RGrC78TC8P2Vur8zFNk_ZNwJN63ElnLl407uAAr71oaHMzoMgeyN7-xutxn-eXyAoqHp5rUzLAWLGKTJWHgiAkaPrubgdmQSz4xh2fB7cnl2UB2J85_NLWpaFU0qs2QA/s200/match+point.jpg)
Drew: Easy pickins.
My draft board is in shambles and my pants are tightening by the minute.
We take a break here while waiting for Ape to show up. Apparently somebody forgot to tell Mr. Commuter that Adrian Fenty never promised to make the trains run on time.
Ufford: I have a Word Document and IMDb open. I forgot how consuming these drafts are.
Drew: It's hard to ignore Jesssica alba, but Carla gugino is Sin City is just about the hottest thing I've ever seen.
Me: If i wanted an old chick i'd pick Mrs. Robinson
Drew: We need about thirty rounds for this draft. I am trying to take a mental inventory of just how many times I masturbated to each of these characters.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhB9AKv0xOU5c-LGRD5i8IVRCaWoNxqQRjnRzzsBh2lsvpOMLQ_lo69eBNd75LqPsh5pVJ5741is53qGFN6D2GBMU8xvIfKH-8OBue1HymsFfW7J8GpPeCFpYDkDJUcaZfmGYQiGA/s320/catwoman_halle_berry_leather_costume.jpg)
Ape: Okay, I'll take the Halle Catwoman, then, y'know, for the jokes.
Insert cat joke here ________.
Insert Ufford's righteous indignation at this lack of a joke here _______.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiixNNq2bnfYHNV5A2z7oVRfP1IZg08Ne3Tb-WOiLaWiOGNZ5ka6faWgT0TxW_w4EAGDxDm2e6zpkuUIRYSRASTStCakkxeEVPyOqKOJD5MnM-UBCf_lpEXLKLvVJdC2XF6Dj2x8g/s320/megan_fox_transformers_movie_image.jpg)
Yep, that's one sexy bitch.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjs1qe2HlnVvrBlX83-mONRk3EK8ZDWHnJcEcns0XqBfN-GbkZ7SJji9olRNKn3qX8TbCYIiLagSFEXIXAMSRYBB4fQKKkK4heYKX5NQ36Kxcr2RuqngW7dDNwVqkJlR-cLVG-lcQ/s320/ferrari+girl.jpg)
Drew: "Are you gonna go for it?" Why, yes. I believe I will.
Christie Brinkley really got jobbed out of the Oscar on this one.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_EfaGts8bGhc4oc_itVW-awVU6-Z0d2-61hyQR4j5zCKMmH2M-AY4LxXfUXuzbfzIsPU4TDlyv6yMA3NGi7ZZFnslaUUbnkPgSOTzFIlB2LAvi0qyymaL8w6fk4sWhqmbOzSZfQ/s320/2charlize.jpg)
I like it when she starts turning into that other chick. It's like fucking two at once! I also like the idea of fucking an MRF.
Flubby: "That's a Lucille, you mullet head! Any girl so innocent and built like that gotta be named Lucille." - Dragline
Everyone: Awesome pick.
And now for your viewing enjoyment, the video goodness!
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifSp5R_quOXL6q-ve48nUbkBJQjqWA9f5cxXAlnwHpTi0YigUpG5Ok217AZtmBaE7zA2t43hvogeOrR8qgnqiB3md_ZP8Lp49v59H4UFPh6y1ZDIKNYm9xTNc9oAOr7l0snwxpOw/s320/underworld.jpg)
Ufford: BAM!
Bam Bam: BAM BAM! BAM!
Emeril: BAM!
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-qvgYv9tFEeNP2uFtigKFfeqPORbXWr_aYOX_fyH98siV8y0jBeYkWFP7XLiYBMJOoK-MT1iLD8SnatwLih4OibeWB_WkV7dv4ABT1o0R2qVNAuTa1XclO0w8ZqJtA6iar98tfA/s400/CZJ+HF.jpg)
Ufford: Charlie was a snooty bitch.
Me: Charlie was a snooty bitch who was HOT AS SHIT!
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEir7umm22dxx_SQG0fOZafN9cqGGsWmgMRqA-EUcmkeju5zblCVAdXnUPDoAxf-K9ws7cAGvUvav2RrTNKSdz5AQzSEoafcGLU5yD1s0wrIlde8J7Kk52Niy5EVUjGZ7T7u6PuqtA/s320/katie.jpg)
Before Scientology got their alien tentacles all over her Katie Holmes was right up there on my overall list with Alba, Berry, and Kournikova (hallowed territory to be sure). She showed the tits in The Gift but I'm a huge fan of Wonder Boys and something about that red-boot wearing literati really gets to me.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbNeLaknGCN3g2Bf9pIkDbIJ1ar9pFZPcv7wQ4r6IE9m4ekSMhxNqBpXyFaeY8DtHpb8o57136tD3BvUtOIbOZMaYNdJ5_PGUkWy1Dv3sUZt8LdH4de-XfKzIzi6Ys_Rmu3Cfcjw/s320/wild+things.jpg)
Ufford: Dump champagne on her huge tits and have a threesome? Don't mind if I do.
Sure, if you're in to that sort of thing.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin_nB_GLQA0UfR5_0nJyj3N9FolNrGx1K5yes17ZrjbGdZYsH_hdg-jWLQPcc6DT3yEPHhWCaESF6_x6zoXSlAtU42BXYuQ-vFrpBGW1gQ99mD-qWNlRtZW6WHTtPMf4_RyoCZKw/s320/2SHANNON.jpg)
You want me jerk you off?
And all this time I thought Punter didn't care for the foreigners.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjbG86mLFVgsa5crTTVOVGJcKme3qkjDIDLkd7sWGqK3ienxZntfCtXnXCJeulIh8p7EoNlLceIIe1IEgBoxsttEdkZD31UkRKQebA_vrT_dmiJ4kaZ3wzR1qr8QBfSOfIj6Bpgg/s400/crazyleg.jpg)
Flubby: Because who hasn't always wanted to do a chick with a machine gun/rocket launcher leg?
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzMLBZ68Nd116S-0LWlvkIZZbGBCerDRsQXtb5nPlh3Ca4A-H85ZLvzD9a6kF0_GHrMIkCcmJy861fg2LRhAUjtSN9T9Df3rQ5eg0AqSU1iVSsqrH_QHHnsgJB_IANtJXutBhaGA/s320/bachelor+party+safe.jpg)
Drew: I had this movie on my VCR and wore out hte tape rewinding and jerking to this scene. sometimes I couldn't finish in time, so I had to rewind with my dick in my hand. NSFW picture can be found here.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ_wJCjfPYAxaFtKiFX4fqOg51lwfXfULcZMRVOCIbriMDZAKtoxz04s3dsxhLAF7OrLeZwve0vq0doXhzhUfvBTYohG7FeSJAWqBVo-Io-NnUjVQ6Khzn3ecx4Ocu9eSvrxpqow/s200/chinese+girl.jpg)
Saucy. Exotic. Scary?
AND THERE YOU HAVE IT!
There are way too many honorable mentions to list them all here and frankly, we could have gone all night long. So feel free to add in your own picks in the comments.
Oh fuck it, here's one (NSFW!) honorable mention...
Jessica Alba in Idle Hands
ReplyDeletehttp://www.metacafe.com/watch/176639/idle_hands/
first post and I already broke the rules.
ReplyDeleteFuck I suck. I still say this trumps Sin City
Kathryn Merteuil - Cruel Intentions. She'd let me put it anywhere.
ReplyDeleteHonorable Mention: Lisa from Weird Science, Salma Hayek's character in Desperado, Christina Milian in Be Cool, Lana from Risky Business.
ReplyDeleteVery honorable mention:
ReplyDeleteCatherine Trammel in Basic Instinct
Brenda Bakke in Hot Shots Part Deux
Rebecca DeMornay in Risky Business
Christina Ricci in Black Snake Moan
Lindsay Lohan in Mean Girls
Karen Sisco in Out of Sight
Daisy Duke in Dukes of Hazzard
Kate Bosworth in Blue Crush
Eliza Dushku in Bring it on
Sloan Peterson in Ferris Bueller
Nicollete Sheridan in Spy Hard
Jamie Lee Curtis in Trading Places/True Lies
Vanessa Angel in Kingpin anyone?
ReplyDeleteMatthew McConnaughey in A Time to Kill.
ReplyDeleteHot, smart and before he got weird and gay with Jake Gyllenhal.
Cherry Darling would have been my number one pic, Flub. You got a steal getting her that late.
ReplyDeleteWTF, where is Christina Ricci in Black Snake Moan...I would have fucked her face to face in that movie. Had I directed that bitch would have been NC-17 like god intended.
ReplyDeleteHell, even my prude of a lady would have banged her.
Betty Childs from "Revenge of the Nerds."
ReplyDeleteMarissa Tomei in My Cousin Vinny. I can't explain it, so don't ask.
ReplyDeleteCameron Diaz in the Mask. When she walks into the bank when it's raining outside and she's in that red dress. Damn, I gotta go change my pants.
ReplyDeleteTenley Parrish (Jessica Biel) in Summer Catch
ReplyDeleteSloan Peterson is an amazing pick Drew
ReplyDeleteMy bad drew, just saw your comments. No fair, how you gonna take 12 of the best and then suck up the rest in the honorable mention section.
ReplyDeleteIn other news, I saw Gone, Baby Gone last night...hehehehehehehe. That thing read like a documentary of the Boston Public.
Penny Lane (Kate Hudson) in Almost Famous
ReplyDeleteI knew my peepee was forgetting someone, grimey.
ReplyDeleteSienna Miller in Layer Cake. Done and done.
ReplyDeleteJane Smith (Angelina Jolie) in Mr. and Mrs. Smith
ReplyDeleteJamie Lee Curtis in Trading Places/True Lies
ReplyDeleteDaring!
I'm a Bridget Fonda in Jackie Brown fan, myself.
No fair, how you gonna take 12 of the best and then suck up the rest in the honorable mention section.
ReplyDeleteSeriously. Nice cockblocking, Bambi Daddy Drew.
Monica Belucci - Irréversible
ReplyDelete(0ver the line?)
Betty or Rita from Mulholland Drive. If you haven't seen it, rent it tonight. Scratch that - hit the youtube right fucking now. Then rent it tonight.
ReplyDeleteAlice (Natalie Portman) Closer. Stripper outfit mandatory
ReplyDeleteNo fair, how you gonna take 12 of the best and then suck up the rest in the honorable mention section.
ReplyDeleteYou're right. Shouldn't have done that.
By the way, I find it humorous that two of the characters who got drafted ended up getting shot, and I didn't mind so much in either case
ReplyDeleteHarmony Faith Lane (Michelle Monaghan) in "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang"
ReplyDeleteDoes the ten pipck rule still stand?
ReplyDeleteNot sure...
Well, Ms.Honeywell (Kim Catrall) from Porky's.
oooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
Beatrice (Asia Argento) in B. Monkey (I'll watch pretty much anything on IFC with hot chicks)
ReplyDeleteDAMMIT, Grimey! Here was the comment I was about to write:
ReplyDeleteMichelle Monaghan as Harmony in Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. She shows her breasts AND corrects people's grammar!
/swoons
Elisabeth Shue, Leaving Las Vegas
ReplyDeleteEr, Otto Man, rather. You all look alike.
ReplyDeletegrace kelly- Rear Window.
ReplyDeletey'all are thinking WAY too contemporary.
Ursula Andress (Honey Ryder) in Dr. No
ReplyDeleteKelly Preston from Jerry Maguire - liked her better in that movie than in Mischief.
ReplyDeleteDanielle from The Girl Next Door (Elisha Cuthbert)
ReplyDeleteYes, indeed.
Sorry, CC. If it makes you feel better, LSF just beat me to Grace Kelly.
ReplyDeleteAs long as I'm here, I'll take Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman) from "Goldfinger"
Anakin Skywalker from "Revenge of the Sith." He's so tormented and passionate. I bet he's absolutely ferocious in the sack.
ReplyDeleteDemi Moore in Indecent Proposal
ReplyDeleteGeorgia Sykes (Alicia Keys) in Smokin' Aces
ReplyDeleteNatalie (Maria Bello) from The Cooler.
ReplyDeletelittle joe
Elizabeth Taylor in Cleopatra.
ReplyDeleteThat's right... kicking it old school.
Selina Kyle (Catwoman) Michelle Pfeiffer Batman Returns
ReplyDeleteO-Ren Ishii from Kill Bill. Dangerous!
ReplyDeleteLulu (Louise Brooks) in Pandora's Box. beautiful, trampy, and totally old-school.
ReplyDeleteHow do the following not appear in this draft: winona in heathers, uma thurman in dangerous liaisons, fairuza balk in anything, melanie griffith in something wild, mary stuart masterson in some kind of wonderful.
yes I was a horny adolescent in the 80s, why do you ask?
Valeria from Conan the Barbarian.
ReplyDeleteBest movie girlfriend of all time.
Where the bond girls at? Xenia Onoatopp - Goldeneye. She'll kick your ass while you're tapping hers.
ReplyDeleteIf you're into that kind of stuff at least.
Tia Carrere in Wayne's World
ReplyDeleteNatasha Henstridge, Species - just as long as I can finish before she off's me.
ReplyDelete@KC Cal - Onatopp is a great call.
ReplyDeleteMaribel Verdu in Y Tu Mama Tambien
ReplyDeleteMadeline Kahn in Blazing Saddles
ReplyDelete"It's twue!!"
Leeloo - The 5th Element
ReplyDeleteThe Devil (Elizabeth Hurley) Bedazzled
ReplyDeletePaz Vega - Sex and Lucia
ReplyDeleteJennifer Connoley - Requiem for a Dream. Yeah lesbian dildo scene.
ReplyDeleteBarbarella (Jane Fonda) in, well, "Barbarella."
ReplyDeleteMarilyn Monroe - The Seven Year Itch.
ReplyDeleteCarrie Fisher (Princess Leia) in Return of the Jedi
ReplyDeleteJames Bond from Casino Royale.
ReplyDeleteOh, Daniel Craig you tight bathing suit wearing wonder you.
@mike, no Molly Ringwald or Lea Thompson ?
ReplyDeleteI'll take both:
Ringwald in Pretty in Pink and Thompson in Red Dawn. Wolverines !
@turleygirlie: WORD on Jake Brigance in ATTK.
ReplyDeleteMy pick: Clive Owen as King Arthur. I would do anything that man wanted.
@smello: Damn it, I was going to take Craig but I felt like I needed to let some other ladies chime in first... now I'm going to have to be selfish and go with Leo DiCaprio, from that scene in The Departed when he nails his psychiatrist on the counter. That scene alone was enough to win Best Picture in my book.
ReplyDeleteJennifer Jason Leigh - Fast TIme at Ridgemont High.
ReplyDeleteThat's right... in the dugout.
Syd (Gabrielle Union) from "Bad Boys II"
ReplyDeleteMy #1 here would be Lucy Liu in Payback.
ReplyDeleteAnd Rebecca Romjin in Femme Fatale would have been my value pick in Round 2.
Gina Gershon... bound
ReplyDelete@jim: "ASS to ASS!!!"
Dr Kathryn Railly (Madeleine Stowe) in Twelve Monkeys. I'v always had a thing for her. Thing.....ha ....spontanious dick joke.
ReplyDeleteIsla Fisher in Wedding Crashers. Sure, she's psychotic. But I likee me some crazy redhead.
ReplyDeleteOr... Jennifer Connelly. Career Opportunities. Ta-dow!
ReplyDeleteI would just like to reiterate: Hot Shots Part Deux is a terrible movie. But the blond chick in it (Brenda Bakke) is fucking beyond hot. It's a testament to her that I was able to whack it so often to a PG-13 movie.
ReplyDelete"In my hands nothing turns to putty."
Susan - Big. a little old school, but it was awesome when he palmed her tit
ReplyDeletePolly Prince (Aniston) in Along Came Polly.
ReplyDeleteKim Basinger (Vicki Vale) in Batman
ReplyDeleteAlthough I could list half of the movie... Eurotrip
ReplyDeleteMeikie - Jessica Boehrs
Wierd Leather S&M Lady - Lucy Lawless
*Xena Warrior Princess anyone?*
dammit otto man, i was gonna take ol jane in that, but only if i got to pull the double osi (Shit and piss) all over her. Always been a dream of mine.
ReplyDeleteSalma Hayek in Desperado.
ReplyDelete"Help me! Help me! This is Salma Hayek. Over here! Please help me! I am lost and I have no clothes!"
You other ladies have some truly execellent taste in the man meat.
ReplyDeleteMy second pick, before I must return to actually working...
King Leonidas in 300.
Holy hell does that pre-war sex scene heat up a room.
Anne Hathaway - Havoc.
ReplyDeleteRita Hayworth in Gilda
ReplyDeleteAlso since we are way down the line now, I doubt I would be alone in recommending Reagan (Linda Blair) in Exorcist Part 2 when she is 18.
ReplyDeleteJulia Stiles, the Bourne Ultimatum. What? I can't explain it.
ReplyDeleted_g: Hathaway is a great pick.
if i can't poop on jane fonda, i'll take jessica simpson from dukes of hazard, since i'd feel comfortable pooping on her.
ReplyDeleteClarice Starling (Julianne Moore) Hannibal, What? You were thinking Jodi Foster? You draft her then! Punch, I too likee redheads!
ReplyDeleteBrad Pitt in Oceans 11, 12, 13.
ReplyDeleteWhat a steal in this round.
Has anyone taken Estelle Getty from "Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot?"
ReplyDeleteI agree with the Hathaway call. Very much so.
ReplyDeleteJune Carter Cash (Reese Witherspoon) in Walk the Line
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteJeanne in Last Tango in Paris.
ReplyDeleteYes, I will butter her roll.
@otto man
ReplyDeleteYou owe me a new keyboard.
Samantha (Linda Cardellini) from Grandma's Boy and Shirley Jones from the same movie. She totally played a horny old slut in that movie.
ReplyDeleteHelena Bonham Carter in Fight Club
ReplyDeleteI'm just full of good ideas today...
ReplyDeleteBrittany Daniel in Joe Dirt.
(almost took her from Club Dread, but she's hotter in Joe Dirt)
@turleygirlie: I think we have a mind meld or something, because you keep picking the ones I want! And now I can't pick him for Fight Club. Damn.
ReplyDeleteI'll go with Josh Lucas in Stealth. Hotness + uniform = yes, please.
Nina hartley from boogie nights, so i can lay someone in a driveway.
ReplyDeletesmurfette - If you took him from fight club, you would really be getting Ed Norton
ReplyDeleteJennifer Tilly Bride of Chucky
ReplyDeleteRaquel Welch in 1,000,000 BC
ReplyDeleteSorry Devang.
ReplyDeleteSome guys like cougars, some guys like sabertooth tigers.
Fuck! Can't believe I forgot this one earlier - I know Angelina Jolie is long gone, but Julia Russell in Original Sin is worth the break in the rules.
ReplyDeleteJennifer Lopez in Selena
ReplyDeleteKeira Knightley in Bend It Like Beckham
ReplyDelete@john s. - A threesome with Brad Pitt and Edward Norton? Oh, holy god, yes.
ReplyDeleteAaliyah (Trish O'Day) in Romeo Must Die.
ReplyDeleteHey she wasn't dead then!
kristy swanson in The Chase
ReplyDeleteSorry, smurphette...I couldn't believe he wasn't taken yet.
ReplyDelete/trying to figure out if Becks has been in a movie
The first action movie I saw was The Terminator.
ReplyDeleteConsequently, the first breasts I saw were Linda Hamilton's. I'll take her and her sweet near-mullet.
Carrie-Anne Moss (Trinity) in the Matrix
ReplyDeleteAlso...thanks for that threesome image.
ReplyDelete/spank bank full now
Alabama Worely
ReplyDelete@ dougolis
ReplyDeleteI was debating her myself, but I couldn't get over her blank expressions during the sex in Matrix Reloaded.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteOoh, I like the King Leonidas call.
ReplyDeleteDamn it, I was DYING to take Adam Banks in D2:The Mighty Ducks; sadly, a little IMDB-ing reveals that young Vinnie LaRusso did not reach the age of consent until D3, in which he was no longer as cute. Let the record show that I would still absolutely take the 16-year-old Banks and have no qualms whatsoever about it (god, I used to teach high school...). However, in accordance with the rules of the draft, I'll take Ryan Reynolds in Van Wilder.
New Pick =
ReplyDeleteAlyssa Milano - Embrace of the Vampire.
Brittany Daniel - Joe Dirt
Anne Hathaway - Havoc
Rebecca Romijn Stamos - Femme Fatale
Lucy Liu - Payback
@dougolis - nice pick.
Jennifer Johnson (?) Blame it on Rio (the girl Michael Caine was banging).
ReplyDeleteStrangely enough...I'll take Doc Holliday (Val Kilmer) from Tombstone.
ReplyDeleteDon't ask me to explain - I can't.
@walker: Kristy Swanson was fucking hot in that. Plus the sex in the car while being chased down the free, nice.
ReplyDeleteCharlize Theron (Aileen) in Monster. Yeah, screw you bitches. I can't believe she wasn't taken and I'm waisting her on this.
P.J. Soles in Stripes with the "aunt jemimah" treatment.
ReplyDeletesmurfette - Well... I guess you might look at the pick that way.
ReplyDeleteFor my next pick...
Tracy (Diana Rigg) from On Her Majesty's Secret Service
300 is a nice call. However, I would have elected to have been the role of pitcher, rather than catcher.
ReplyDelete@turelygirlie: In to dudes with TB?
ReplyDeleteLula Fortune (Laura Dern) Wild at Heart
ReplyDelete@dougolis
ReplyDeleteThe rules are simple, draft a character from a movie, once the movie has been picked it is off limits and once an actress has been picked all of her other roles are off limits.
She's been picked. I tried as well.
Bo Dereck in 10
ReplyDeleteChloe from Fight Club - She's well prepared and I'd be going a good deed by fucking someone.
ReplyDeleteSharon Stone Basic Instinct
ReplyDeleteSean Young in Dune
ReplyDelete@turleygirle: No need to apologize. That's the beauty of this game. Everybody wins :)
ReplyDelete@futuremrs: Damn again! "Are you stalking me? Because that would be super." Oh well, at least the KSK commenter ladies have good taste in hypothetical one-night stands.
I pick James McAvoy in Atonement. That scene in the library . . . shivers going up my spine just thinking about it.
Betsy Russell in "Private School"
ReplyDeleteHow is Charlize Theron not taken yet? I'll take her in Monster...just kidding, Stella in Italian Job.
ReplyDeleteAlso Christabella(connie neilsen) in Devils Advocate
@JimmyCraghorn, I'm more of a Rock and Roll high School PJ Soles fan.
ReplyDeleteNew Pick =
ReplyDeleteJenna Fischer - Blades of Glory
Alyssa Milano - Embrace of the Vampire.
Brittany Daniel - Joe Dirt
Anne Hathaway - Havoc
Rebecca Romijn Stamos - Femme Fatale
Lucy Liu - Payback
Never mind on Charlize I was too late
ReplyDeletecindy crawford in Fair Game
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteDiane Lane in Unfaithful.
ReplyDeleteThat hallway scene is the tits!
Mary McCormack (Alyson Stern)HowardStern: Private Parts
ReplyDeleteI'll take a Bond girl. Cary Lowell as Pam Bouvier in License to Kill. very hot 20 years ago.
ReplyDeleteLinda Fiorentino - Jade
ReplyDeletePenelope Cruz in Blow
ReplyDeleteJeanne Tripplehorn - Basic Instinct
ReplyDeleteOver the Chair, baby!
Michelle Trachtenberg. I'll go with her in EuroTrip.
ReplyDeleteSissy Knox (Parker Posey) in A Mighty Wind.
ReplyDeleteTania Chernova (Racehl Wiecz) in Enemy at the Gates.
ReplyDeleteNice to be with a girl who could try and group as well as I can.
Vera Farmiga from The Departed
ReplyDeleteNew Pick =
ReplyDeleteAlicia Silverstone in Clueless
Roster:
Jenna Fischer - Blades of Glory
Alyssa Milano - Embrace of the Vampire.
Brittany Daniel - Joe Dirt
Anne Hathaway - Havoc
Rebecca Romijn Stamos - Femme Fatale
Lucy Liu - Payback
I think I have one more pick and then I actually have to work....
Ok, just onnnnnnnnnnne more. Colin Farrell in Minority Report. He just gives off this disciplinarian vibe I could seriously get down with.
ReplyDeleteHayden
Leo
Ryan
Colin
Sweet.
FUCKKK. Imogen Poots from 28 Weeks Later breaks the rules by weeks... Ugh.
ReplyDeleteHas no one picked baby momma Bridget? in say, The Recruit
ReplyDeleteDorothy Vallens (Isabella Rossellini)in Blue Velvet
ReplyDelete@devang: Where the fuck did I pick one that was already used? I searched and found no prior uses for any. Douche.
ReplyDeleteAnd my final pick (maybe): Hilary Swank as Brandon Teena in Boys Don't Cry.
wait, what?
is it sad that the best part of the post for me was the ":("?
ReplyDeletenot to say it wasn't a great post, it was.
That one Drew Barrymore played in...oh, wait, you said over 18.
ReplyDeleteThat one Natalie Portman played in...oh, wait, you said over 18.
Shit. Not my turn anyway.
Ariel (Ann-Margaret) in Grumpier Old Men. I like the cougars...
ReplyDeleteNo - really - you ladies are reading my mind. I would've taken the Blade Trinity version of RR & the Top Gun version of Val, but I see the value in both of your picks.
ReplyDeletePick 3 is going back to my youth...
Matt Dillon in The Outsiders.
MAria Bello - in a cheerleader outfit
ReplyDelete@ greg: "Bo Dereck in 10"
ReplyDeleteI never saw that movie, but I did see her in Tarzan, the Ape Man. I must say, she looked fucktastic.
Winona Ryder Mina Murray - Dracula
ReplyDelete@dougolis
ReplyDelete9. (MMP) Mary Ann Lomax - The Devils' Advocate
I like it when she starts turning into that other chick. It's like fucking two at once! I also like the idea of fucking an MRF.
there ya go.
Shannyn Sossamon as Lady Jocelyn in A Knight's Tale.
ReplyDeleteElle "The Body" in Sirens
ReplyDeleteI am still, a half hour later, sitting at my desk wishing I was Diane Lane in the hallway scene. Lucky bitch.
ReplyDeleteLeslie Bibb in Talladega Nights.
ReplyDelete"You won't find another rack like that, I guarantee it"
with the steal of the draft I take Ali Larter from Varsity Blues ... all I have to say is whipped cream bikini
ReplyDeleteFinal Roster:
ReplyDeleteAnne Heche - Wild Side
Alicia Silverstone - Clueless
Jenna Fischer - Blades of Glory
Alyssa Milano - Embrace of the Vampire.
Brittany Daniel - Joe Dirt
Anne Hathaway - Havoc
Rebecca Romijn Stamos - Femme Fatale
Lucy Liu - Payback
Winner Winner, chicken dinner.
That chick from Saving Silverman
ReplyDeleteBeth (Amy Smart) from Road Trip. How has no one taken her yet?
ReplyDeleteI'm fucking Parker Posey, and you're claiming victory? Try again, dood.
ReplyDeleteKate Capshaw in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
ReplyDeleteYou call him Dr Jones!
oh, I see. I stand corrected. I forgot that was her.
ReplyDeleteI just realized that Keira Knightley may have been sub-18 in Bend It Like Beckham. But she's British so it doesn't count right? Since age of consent is lower? If not, I switch it to Pride and Prejudice.
@landru, give me some Parker Posey in House of Yes.
ReplyDeleteNice call.
Last pick of the day: Jason Statham in Snatch.
ReplyDeleteKing Arthur
Lt. Ben Gannon
Robbie Turner
Turkish
I am the Bill Polian of KSK mock drafts. Some big names, some sleepers, all hitting my needs perfectly. Yowza.
Elizabeth Banks--40 year old virgin
ReplyDeleteFreaky as shit
It's okay, Dougolis, I wouldn't have fucked Drew Barrymore at any age.
ReplyDelete@sl - I was torn between Amy Smart and Shannyn Sossamon. I figured Sossamon had more length and upside - not to mention she's a poor man's Keira Knightley. I stand by my decision.
ReplyDeleteMandy Pepperidge - Animal House
ReplyDeleteThe late great John Belushi and his ladder would agree.
OK - since my boss has been in here twice, I really do need to work. So, I'm picking two.
ReplyDeleteEric Bana as Hector in that abomonation that was Troy.
Dominic Purcell in Blade: Trinity.
Daniel Craig/James Bond
Gerard Butler/King Leonidas
Matt Dillon/Dallas Winston
Eric Bana/Hector
Dominic Purcell/Drake
And...I'm done.
Isla Fischer in Hot Rod.
ReplyDeleteStill just as hot as she was in Wedding Crashers, but incredibly kind, sensitive and understanding instead of psychopathic and sexually insatiable.
I'm a softie.
@GldnKnight5
ReplyDeleteNice, although I would've picked Shelly Dubinsky (Fawn Leibowitz's roommate)
My last pick is Mo'nique from Beerfest
I'll leave with 2 and be happy. This one is a "you have to like this type of girl" pick, but I am going with:
ReplyDeleteEllen Page from Juno (pre-pregnant scenes)
Roster:
Leslie Bibb (Talladega Nights)
Ellen Page (Juno)
And I am taking my ball and going home.
Brittany (Susan Ward)-The In Crowd
ReplyDeleteIt's nice that I can come back from lunch and still pick up Sue (Lauren Graham) from Bad Santa
ReplyDeleteKathy Ireland in Necessary Roughness
ReplyDeleteApril (Eva Mendes) from Stuck on You.
ReplyDeleteIsis (Gabrielle Union) from Bring it On.
Dammit Grimey! Nice call.
ReplyDeleteNicole Eggert as Megan in the real version of Blown Away, even if it is sloppy thirds to both Corey's
ReplyDeleteJennifer Love Hewitt is still available, I believe. I'll take her in I Still Know What You Did Last Summer.
ReplyDeleteRene Mosier (Shannon Doherty) from Mallrats
ReplyDeleteNot gonna lie... It's gonna get a little weird...
ReplyDeleteJasmine from Aladdin. Not into cartoons, but I'd make an exceptio...er- I mean if she were a real person. Yea that's it.
Sarah Silverman as herself in Jesus is Magic.
ReplyDeleteAlthough some serious washing might be in order to remove the Kimmel leavings.
Christina Applegate in Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead
ReplyDeleteI like it for such a late pick
Veronica Vaughn from Billy Madison.
ReplyDelete"That Veronica Vaughn is one hot piece of ass." - Chris Farley
Classic.
Bai Ling? "2046?" I must have missed that... Or is it the standard "All Asians look alike" thing?
ReplyDeleteMy pick is Anna Karina in Band of Outsiders.
Snooty!
Foxxy Cleopatra (Beyonce) in Austin Powers Goldmember
ReplyDeletePatricia Arquette in True Romance.
ReplyDeleteGoing ahead of Rosanna due the larger bosoms and lack of metal in her face.
Ladies... no Christian Bale? I'll take the twins from "the Prestige."
ReplyDeleteRay Charles' wife (Kerry Washington)
ReplyDeleteI don't see C.Z. Jones up there, but Ocean's Twelve was taken by one of the girls, so I guess I'll go with her in the abominable Mark of Zorro.
ReplyDeleteIf we're going into cartoons, then Ariel from The Little Mermaid.
ReplyDeleteShe might actually be hotter with the fishtail instead of legs.