National Mascot Semifinal: Titan vs. Bear – QUIEN ES MAS MACHO?!

Who gets to face the Bengal in our Kill Kill Kill Championship? I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t rooting for the bear, because I bet a quick YouTube search could find me a bitchin’ Bear vs. Tiger fight. But first, the Bear must beat the tourney’s overall #1 seed, the dreaded Titan. Let’s rig it! We go right to the pros and cons and ask you, the fan, who would win in a fight… to the death! Indeed, QUIEN ES MAS MACHO?

NOTE: The poll is at the top of the sidebar to the right. Voting for each contest is open until the end of the day that it's posted.

TITAN


The Titan you’re voting on is Phoebe, Titan of the moon. Lame. According to myth, she gave birth to Leto. I’m assuming that means Jared Leto, who’s a total douche. Look at this fatty.


Way to gain 5,000 lbs. for a shitty Mark David Chapman biopic, asshead. I guess Leto is a Method Douche. He received classical training in douchebaggery from Lee Strasberg himself.

BEAR


The Bear you’re voting on is famed Marvel comic mutant Ursa Major. By day. Mikhail Ursus is your garden variety Soviet Super-Soldier. But by night, he’s a goddamn BEAR! With claws and fangs and all that shit! He grew up in the wild, so he knows the terrain! Also, according to Wikipedia:

In the space of a few seconds, Ursa Major can, at will, turn himself into a bear-like creature, larger and more anthropomorphic than an ordinary ursine. In this form he possesses super-strength and animal-like senses while retaining his human intelligence and speech, although his behavior and personality become more beast-like.

Take that, Ant Man! Fag!

Bizarre side note: I used to have all the Marvel Universe comics when I was a kid. Those were the comic books that listed all the Marvel characters in alphabetical order and detailed their history and all their abilities. I loved checking them out, but I hated ACTUAL comic books. I liked reading about all the awesome shit Marvel heroes could do, but I was bored out of my fucking mind seeing them in action. Go figure.

Voting closes at the end of the day. Let the battle begin. ENTER THE OCTAGON!