This is Katie Couric. I fucking hate Katie Couric. I don’t know when this deathless monotone was labeled perky, but I can’t think of a worse descriptor. Katie Couric is as perky as I am classy. She exhibits all the warmth of a fucking emperor penguin. The mom in Ordinary People was more caring. I know trees that have more spontaneity.
If you plan on watching CBS’ Super Bowl pre-game telethon (and I do not), you better get used to seeing this vacuous harpy on your TV screen. That’s right, Couric has butted her way into CBS’ pre-game show in order to do a piece on Hines Ward returning to Korea with his mom. And nothing gets you psyched for this year’s Super Bowl like a story from last year’s Super Bowl. I can easily wait.
What Katie Couric needs is a good old-fashioned hate fucking. And I know exactly the man to give it to her. He’s the guy who managed to string together four consecutive decent passes in the NFC title game, a rare personal feat. He's this week's Meast. But, more importantly, he’s the guy that would shatter Katie Couric’s vertebrae driving her into the headboard. I think you know exactly who I’m talking about:
Courage. Bitch.
NOTE: Special thanks to Nick K for the t-shirt design. We will be coming up with our own very soon.
+10 Sweet-ass photoshop
ReplyDelete-2 Using Eddie Izzard's face
Rexy looks like he has just a TOUCH of Down Syndrome there. Otherwise, excellent.
ReplyDeleteThe Mothering Hut needs to make some of these. I thing there is a market for some KSK shirts.
ReplyDeleteLike I told CC yesterday...
ReplyDeletethat logo is f'n awesome.
And someone needs to make a t-shirt out of it.
Is that Katie Couric or Dick Cheney?
ReplyDeleteI want that t-shirt.
ReplyDeleteuh-oh, a competitor in Rexography: http://myespn.go.com/conversation/story?id=2751840 .
ReplyDeleteGreat, the Olympification of the sports world continues unabated.
ReplyDeleteYou need to Vulcanize those eyebrows a bit on that logo.
ReplyDeleteThat was great!
ReplyDeleteThanks.
Those weren't HTML tags, they were tags used on message boards.
ReplyDeleteAnd I believe the proper term is "grudge fuck" as in I'd like to grudge fuck katie couric.
And you need to give him more of a smirk that says-
ReplyDelete"This might hurt you a bit, but it's gonna feel great for me."
There's room enough here
ReplyDeleteFor both hate and grudge fucks
This is our country.
Somehow Hoosier John Mellancamp got let off the hook earlier. Fuck you, Cougar.
How does one join the F*** It I'm Goin Deep Fan Club? I want to "unleash the dragon".
ReplyDeleteI will buy that T-shirt if and when you guys decide to have them made. I mean it.
ReplyDeletethat's not our design. but don't worry, we're working on it.
ReplyDeleteWTF...It looks like Katie Couric is about to open up and unhinge her jaw....
ReplyDelete...that Sex Cannon is HUGE!
This is pretty anal retentive and I may have missed the point, but shouldn't the writing around the outer edge say "If you think a 5 - yard out" and not "I you think a 5 - yard out?" I'll go back to reading my dictionary now.
ReplyDeletedougolis,
ReplyDeleteI don't think that's meant to be a letter I, I think it's meant to be a line to show you where the sentence starts. Might be less confusing if there were a line in between each one.
I hate that liberal bitch too.
ReplyDeleteThat said, I'd like to see Rexy eat the corn out of her shit.
First, that logo is fuckin' awesome... Put me down for a T-shirt as well.
ReplyDeleteSecond, Katie Couric is like a full 180 from what the Super Bowl should be about. If I wanted to slit my wrists, take a bunch of sleping pills, then slash my throat just in case, I'll listen to her drone on.
Since I expect to be alive on Monday, then...you know where this is going...
Third, this site is on the exponential take off trajectory like the Challenger, here's hoping for a better ending.
Out!
Please put me down for a T-shirt as well. I can pay in dollars or booze.
ReplyDeleteHey Clit...er...Clint,
ReplyDeleteYour fiance Stephanie is my favorite thing too....snoogins!
Oh and by the way, Katie Couric is a fat, cocksucking, liberal pig.
ReplyDeleteAnd I didn't rip on MMP, I ripped on Unsilent Majority.
ReplyDeleteEnough with the hate/grudge fucking.
ReplyDeleteIt's properly termed "punish fucking".
Strunk and White, look it up.
Lose the "***"'s as well. Think Rexy's worried about a little f***ing cursing? Think not.
ReplyDeleteNotice how CBS gave Katie Couric the mega-push in promos during the Super Bowl. Unfortunately they decided to go with the "we have warm and fuzzy news!" angle, which didn't quite fit the audience.
ReplyDeleteBut, hey, CBS is paying her $60 million over five years, so she's going to get the exposure, ratings trends be damned.