Oh, who are we kidding? We knew we were gonna be huge; we just didn't think it would happen this fast. In our first three days, thanks to mad props from Deadspin and Mr. Irrelevant, we've registered over 800,000,000 unique visitors. And you know that that's true, because I used a number to prove a fact.
Anyway, with a long holiday weekend looming, your new favorite football bloggers are going to be busting their asses working on comedy previews for all 31 pro teams, plus the Texans (Except Drew -- he's changing diapers on vacation like the domesticated little bitch he is. And yes, I will use that Texans joke ALL YEAR). These previews, along with other funny tidbits about fantasy football and various retards around the NFL, will be published haphazardly and continuously until the beginning of the season. We're going to try for two posts a day Monday through Thursday, one post on Friday, and zero arrests from masturbating to porn while driving on the weekends.
So, enjoy the Independence Day weekend -- America, FUCK YEAH! I leave you with this...
God, could he BE any more dreamy?
Please ask Tom Brady to stop eye fucking me. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteYes, Salman Rushdie is a sweet piece of ass.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeletedude, you should see my buddy Sal Bass
ReplyDeleteSomewhere on the internets there's a video of me screaming at a televised interview following another New England shellacking of Indy that includes the sentence, "YOU HUSH YOUR WET SEXY PETULANT-LIPPED MOUTH, TOM BRADY!!"
ReplyDeleteThere's a fine line between hate and hot.
Anybody remember those auto insurance commercials with clips of the moronic things people do while driving (putting on mascara, reading the paper, etc.), with the tag line "they're out there"? What I wouldn't give to see round two of those ads featuring the video of Eddie Griffin. Best ad idea evah!
ReplyDeleteNo CC, he could not be.
ReplyDeleteUM, they're the same guy ... salman -- bass ... He just switched one fish for another!
ReplyDeleteSo bring on the drunken gay football players. No time to rest. Make with the funny.
ReplyDeleteYou know what would be a good way to post more often: More Site Updates!
ReplyDeletediz2000, kill yourself. You're a goddamn moron. Tom, calm the fuck down, give the boys some time. They'll come with the funny soon enough, but they have other priorities, like having families, living life, and thinking shit up. Go play a sport and chill out.
ReplyDeleteOkay looking at that cover, tell me how the hell Brady didn't make the gay list! He definitely looks like he wants a piece of me in th pic!
ReplyDeleteDanny Boy -- thanks. Drew noted something during our private roundtable discussion at the secret KSK headquarters hidden in the Andes: blogging about your blog is as bad as it gets. Actually, the word he used was "gay."
ReplyDeleteAnyway, Tom, fear not: all site updates from here on out will come at the end of a REAL football post.
Damn, Danny Boy. I was joking. I do probably need to curtail my use of exclamation points, though...maybe more ellipses...that's the ticket.
ReplyDeleteCC- Christ, the Andes? I hope this isn't about you guys.
ReplyDeletehttp://tinyurl.com/hht73
If you have to make the choice, eat Footsteps Falco.
The reason for so many site visits. The title of the blog. Increase traffice from lesbians who thought it was a porn/fantasy site for them.
ReplyDeleteWait. This ISN'T a lesbian porn site? Damn internet browsers.
ReplyDeleteOh, and if that's Rushdie, they're real.
So Holly, you're going to make that comment and not post a link? For shame, Holly. For shame.
ReplyDeletethe only lesbian porn you'll see on this website will be coming from the carolina cheerleader tryouts.
ReplyDeleteDweeze, for the sake of what's left of my dignity, I'll leave it to your imagination.
ReplyDeleteBut trust me, it ain't pretty.
diz2000- in the words of the great Charlie Murphy:
ReplyDelete"That's the gayest shit I ever heard!"
So far, so good, KSK.