Hey, great use of our tax dollars, assholes at the Department of Transportation. For all the millions you spend producing these pointless ads telling us that police arrest people for drunk driving then spending outsize dollars to air 600 of them an hour, we could possibly hire more officers to catch people. I don't know.
Why don't you just enter into an agreement wherein the game announcers mention each player who's been arrested for a DUI or DWI? "There's Cato June with the good open field tackle. By the way, he got popped for a DUI a few months ago. What a dipshit." If authorities are willing to prosecute celebrities for something, we citizens know it's a serious crime. Anything to not have to see these goddamn ads every break.
Seriously - The only thing worse than those DUI ads are the Small Step to Get Healthy ads that have d-bags tripping over body parts of the recently obese in supermarkets and such. I've written the Department of Health and Human Services demanding my share of the tax money it took to produce those ads ($0.67) sent back to me and they sent me a letter back telling me to take a small step to fuck myself. Damn the man...
ReplyDeleteI am the king of driving drunk!
ReplyDeletecouple of pennies in the check, close one eye, and then you're good.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteEver notice how the beverage in the cab in that commercial reflects the stereotype of the driver?
ReplyDeleteMulleted redneck in truck --> beer
FatShit Republican in sportscar --> martini
Metrosexual yuppie --> Shiraz
Don't fuck with Cato, he's from Anacostia.
ReplyDeleteI just realized tonite that those were olives floating in his martini.
ReplyDeleteYea, so I've been wasted every time I've seen those commercials and not really paid attention, so what?
It only takes one incident close to you in life and you'll never drive drunk again. Really puts a downer on it.
ReplyDelete...at work on the Sunday before Christmas? Really? Wow. You owe yourself some homemade cookies and some brown liquor, stat.
ReplyDeleteWorking today as well. I yearn for the days when journalists were allowed to be conspicuously drunk on the job.
ReplyDelete@christmas ape - as well as everyone else...
ReplyDeletesalespeople
lawyers
politicians
pilots
etc.
Sorry you had to work ape. Now get yourself a few martinis on the way home.
ReplyDeleteMerry X-mas dude.
It's becoming the norm: the federal government taking money from you to create ads to tell you how to live your life.
ReplyDelete