So Channing Crowder is probably gonna get a start in that game over in England this weekend, as Zach Thomas is hurt, so he'll have a limited amount of time to pick up some of the nuances of that defense. You know, stuff like zone blitz packages, hook coverage, and, well, learning that people in London speak English."I couldn't find London on a map if they didn't have the names of the countries," he said. "I swear to God. I don't know what nothing is. I know Italy looks like a boot. I know London Fletcher. We did a football camp together. So I know him. That's the closest thing I know to London. He's black, so I'm sure he's not from London. I'm sure that's a coincidental name."
I'm sure it is.
Thanks: Rotoworld, via Brandon M. (no link sent, so fuck you)
Channing Crowder is making Miss Teen South Carolina look like Einstein or Fermi.
ReplyDeleteMy fiancee (who's british) met a guy at a bar a long time ago and it apparently went something like this.
ReplyDeleteHim: Hey, whats up, what's your Name?
Her: Lindsay
Him: Is that an accent I hear? Where from?
Her: Yes I'm from England.
Him: Cool. What language do they speak in England.
Her: Sleep with me now!
...ooops
ReplyDeleteHer: Umm, I've got to go.
I'm sorry wormfather, I didn't know you were with her.
ReplyDeleteIt's true. We have no black people in England. They all disappeared one night and we were confused as fuck.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I feel for my poor English bretheren who are still back there, we're inflicting the Dolphins on them.
Channing Crowder - another example of the shining Southern Public School Systems!!!! Go Gators.
ReplyDeletethe jubilant enthusiasm I'm imagining in the sentence "I know London Fletcher," as if implying "does this count?" cracks me up.
ReplyDeletealso the racist bits. comedic gold.
Channing Crowder thinks Santonio Holmes is from San Antonio, TX.
ReplyDeleteChanning Crowder is confused by Leon Washington because he doesnt specify state or d.c.
ReplyDeleteThis makes sense though because Channing Crowder actually lives inside Carol Channing's vagina.
ReplyDeleteI read this on rotoworld yesterday, too. The full article makes it out that CC is just having some fun with us.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.palmbeachpost.com/blogs/content/shared-blogs/palmbeach/miamidolphins/entries/2007/10/24/crowder_discovers_he_wont_need.html?cxntfid=blogs_inside_the_dolphins
"He's black, so I'm sure he's not from London."
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry. I can't stop laughing.
WV: Uzqpuvgo. I think he's going to sack Cleo Lemon at least 3 times on Sunday.
@mannysheadstash
ReplyDeleteyou totally fucking win.
When I moved back to the US from England I was in High School and the most common question I heard was "so are you bilingual?"
ReplyDeleteAnd I didn't even go to High School in the South.
Jesus Christ. The NFL is the one professional sport that has an age/college requirement before you can enter the draft and this is what we get. Are you fucking serious? NBA... You're 18? You can put the rock in the hole? Great you're starting for the Sixers tonight. MLB... You're 18? You can throw 100MPH? Get on the fucking hill? NHL... (yes it's still a professional league) You can skate? You have a hell of a slap shot? Lace 'em up you French-Canadian faggot. Maybe that concussion this holds some water, eh?
ReplyDeletehttp://www.sportingnews.com/yourturn/viewtopic.php?t=224682
The more important question is: what does this mean for Florida's ranking in the next US News College Extravaganza?
ReplyDeleteI love life sometimes. Its all a big circle of events that infrequently leads to awesomeness.
ReplyDeleteIf Zach Thomas doesn't get rear-ended after the Pats thrashing, we don't get this gem from Channing "Florida Gator" Crowder. And if CC went to a real college, we wouldn't get this quote at all. Everything fell just right...
For Christ's sake, the dude scored a 30 on the Wonderlic and was in the National Honor Society in high school. He was joking.
ReplyDeleteBobby Simmons says to stay away from the Chinese food.
ReplyDelete